QI (G series)
QI Series G |
Country of origin |
UK |
No. of episodes |
18 |
Broadcast |
Original channel |
BBC |
Original run |
26 November 2009 – 16 April 2010 |
Series chronology |
|
This is a list of episodes of QI, the BBC comedy panel game television programme hosted by Stephen Fry. Series G was the first in the show's history to be aired in its entirety on BBC One, beginning its run on 26 November 2009.
Episodes
Series G featured a total of 16 editions, plus an extra two compilation episodes, making it the longest series yet,[1] and was the first to be broadcast in its entirety on BBC One. As with the previous series, extended "XL" editions were also shown on BBC Two soon after the normal broadcast. Because of scheduling issues, this only began with the fourth episode. The first episode eventually had its "XL" edition aired some time after the original, but episodes 2, 3, 15 and 16 did not have their XL editions aired until the series was first shown on the digital channel Dave.
Nine new guests appeared in this series; Jack Dee, John Hodgman, Barry Humphries, Lee Mack, Graham Norton, Sue Perkins, Jan Ravens, David Tennant and Sandi Toksvig. Another significant first is that episode 2 featured four guests instead of the usual three (with regular Alan Davies also present).
Accompanying the recordings was a little game Stephen Fry had set up for his Twitter followers. The object was to decipher a word the audience had shouted. The response for "glabrous" was so overwhelming that it made Twitter's Trending Topics list on 9 May 2009.
In Australia, this series being currently broadcast on the Australian Broadcasting Corporation flagship network, ABC1, on Tuesday nights, and then placed on iView, the ABC's online viewing site after the airing, expiring after 2 weeks.
Episode 1 "Gardens"
- Broadcast date
- 26 November 2009
- 20 March 2010 (XL edition)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Rob – A bell tinkling
- Dara – A cash register ker-ching
- David – A shop bell ringing
- Alan – A Cockney market trader shouting out "Pound a punnet! Go on, I've gotta couple of juicy ones here!"
- Theme
As part of the "Gardens" theme, the set was decorated with trees and the inner part of the QI magnifying glass became a garden with flowers in it.
- Topics
- Animals are used for do nothing gardening. Examples include using ducks for paddy fields, and using carp to purify water.
- The panellists are given four tools that were used by gentleman gardeners in the 18th & 19th century.
- Alan was given a walking stick which contained a hidden saw blade, which would be used to cut stray tree branches.
- Tangent: Alan begins to use his his saw to cut through things including the set.
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- David was given a hoe, which with a leather cap on top could be used as a cane, then with the cap removed could be used for weeding.
- Rob was given a glass bottle that was used to grow straight, uniformly shaped cucumbers. It was invented by George Stephenson, the inventor of the locomotive.
- Dara was given a shaker, out of which seeds would be dispersed through the different sized holes.
- The best place to discover a new life form is in your garden (forfeit: the rainforest). In 1971, biologist Jennifer Owen conducted a study in her house in Leicester and discovered 533 species of ichneumon wasp in her back garden, of which 15 were new to Britain and 4 were new to science.
- Tangent: A bee makes enough honey in its lifetime to fill one teaspoon. Alan claims that bees can't drown.
- Tangent: Isham first brought them into Britain in 1847. One of his original 21 still exists today and has been insured for £1 million.
- Tangent: The red cap worn by all garden gnomes derived from German miners, as they wore red caps.
- Tangent: In Wast Water in the Lake District, gnomes put in at a depth of 48 metres for divers to look at; but 3 divers drowned while looking at them and the gnomes were taken away by the police. But when the gnomes were moved down to 50 metres, the police didn't take them away because of health and safety rules.
- Tangent: In Leicester, there is an old quarry where an aeroplane and a bus have been put in for people to look at. In Scapa Flow, there is a massive German fleet, dating from World War I.
- An American drug manufacturer called Eugene Schieffelin suggested that every species of bird named in Shakespeare's works should be represented in America. The only bird species that wasn't already there was the starling, so he released 100 into Central Park, and in consequence there are now 200 million in North America and have since become a major pest in the country.
- Tangent: Starlings come to Brighton in flocks of up to 1 million birds, some even coming from as far away as Germany and Poland.
- The Grocers' apostrophe is a term used to describe somewhere where apostrophes shouldn't be, such as "potato's".
- Tangent: The Grocers' apostrophe has been ridiculed since the 18th century, when the Oxford Companion to the English Language said "there was never a golden age in which the rules for the use of the possessive apostrophe were clear-cut and known, understood and followed by most educated people". Birmingham has now abolished the apostrophe.
- Tangent: In Dublin, Dara once saw a sign that was written as Grocer,s. This leads to a debate about whether or not sign printing companies deliberately let spelling errors go unnoticed.
- Tangent: There are only 5 places in America which have an apostrophe in their name: Martha's Vineyard, Massachusetts; Ike's Point, New Jersey; John E's Pond, Rhode Island; Carlos Elmer's Joshua View, Arizona; and Clark's Mountain, Oregon. (Though not mentioned there is also Carl's Corner, Texas)
- The difference between an Apple and a Pear is that apples float whereas pears sink because they are denser.
- Tangent: The oldest variety of apple is called a Pearmain.
- General Ignorance
- The carbon which makes up the wood in a tree comes from the air (forfeit: earth).
- Australian spiders remain dangerous although no one there has died from a spider's bite since 1981, when antivenoms were introduced.
- Tangent: A number of fatalities have resulted from accidents caused by redback spiders and Australian funnel-web spiders dropping out of such things as sun visors during car journeys.
- XL Extras
- Tangent: Rob compares the use of animals in natural farming to owning a goat to eat your grass and thus not use a lawn mower. However, goats are now being replaced by wallabies.
- Tangent: Masanobu Fukuoka invented natural farming. He also invented seed balls. It is more economical because less seeds are used than normal sowing.
- Tangent: Seed guns are little guns which fire seeds into the ground. The idea is that they encourage people to use guns in a peaceful manner.
- Tangent: Guerrilla gardening.
- Tangent: Stephen tells a joke, in which he sings the song I'm a Little Teapot. He has his arms both in a handle position and says I'm a little teapot, short and stout. He looks at one arm and says here is my handle, then looks at the other one and says oh I'm a sugar bowl.
- Tangent: You should not clean a teapot unless you have to. You should however, rinse it out if it becomes dirty.
- If you go into a shop to get one or two items and you come out with a load of stuff, then you have been subject to a Gruen transfer, named after Victor Gruen. Supermarkets are carefully laid out to increase the chance of sales.
- Tangent: Different music is played at different times of the day in supermarkets because you are more price sensitive at different times.
Episode 2 "Ganimals"
- Broadcast date
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Topics
- Tangent: Other uses of a goose include the use of goose fat for making roast potatoes, and for people to cover themselves with in order to swim the English Channel, although it's not used much for that any more, because it causes people to slip out of the grasp of the lifeboat crew when being rescued. Geese are also reputed to be better guard dogs than dogs and they were also used as chimney sweeps.
- Tangent: It was reputed that at the Nottingham Goose Fair the legendary Robin Hood used goose feathers for his arrows.
- Tangent: The bar-headed goose can increase their flight range by 70% by flying in V formation because it reduces wind shear.
- The reason why giraffes have long necks is so they can fight other giraffes (forfeit: to reach tree tops), a single swipe with the neck can kill a rival giraffe. They don't use them to reach the tree tops, as they have to bend their necks in order to eat.
- Tangent: Giraffes have short necks in comparison to their legs.
- Tangent: At birth a baby giraffe comes out head first, and is six-foot tall.
- Tangent: The staple diet of the giraffe is the acacia plant.
- The commonest form of death for mountain goats is falling off mountains. Despite being nimble, secure and sure-footed, they tend to fight with each other a lot.
- Tangent: It is said that female goats get sexually aroused by the sweat of a human, because it has a similar smell to goats.
- In World War I, seagulls were trained to identify the periscopes of enemy submarines and crap on them, to blind the lens. This failed because the birds couldn't distinguish between British and enemy submarines.
- Tangent: Seagulls are not seabirds, but land birds. They live mainly on cliffs and don't go far out to sea.
- Tangent: In World War II, parrots were kept in the Eiffel Tower to warn when enemy aircraft were approaching.
- Camels blow out their soft palate, known as the palatinus diverticulus or gula to attract females. The camels with the most testosterone have the biggest gulas.
- Tangent: In Saudi Arabia, the gulas are cut out to make the camels better at camel racing. Saudi Arabia imports its camels from Australia, as well as sand.
- Tangent: Sharks can detect electricity, because a lot of fish give off electricity as a weapon.
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: Along with Russia, the armies of North Korea, China, Cuba, Vietnam, Chile and Iran have all practised the goose-step.
- XL Extras
- Tangent: Goose fat is better for roasting potatoes because it allows the potatoes to be cooked at a higher temperature.
- Tangent: Gooseberries get their name because they taste nice when served with goose. The idea of the gooseberry bush being a place of birth is from 19th century slang.
- Tangent: Giraffe tongues are so long they can clean their own ears with them.
- Tangent: Sandi knew a couple who imported their Mini into Kenya. One day when they were out driving they got humped by a giraffe and could not get out.
- Tangent: The American mountain goat is pure white in colour and is not a goat.
- Tangent: In Kenya male goats wear chastity belts so they can only mate at the right time for Kenyan farmers.
- Tangent: In 2007 a Nepalese airline slaughtered two goats to a Hindu God to save a plane.
- Tangent: Sean's goat call is French for goat. His goats were used for cheese.
- Tangent: When the weather is bad all the gulls fly into London, so Londoners know not to go out to the seaside when the gulls fly in.
- Tangent: There was a dramatic increase in the gull population in 1956 because of the creation of landfills. 1956 was the year of the Great Smog which killed thousands of people in London. As a result the Clean Air Act was bought in which made it illegal for people to burn rubbish, so landfills were created to keep the rubbish in, which attracted the gulls.
- Tangent: Sandi was once carrying a pizza outside a pub by the seaside, but a gull stole the whole pizza.
- Gerbils let us down in the War on Terror because although they can smell terror they cannot detect terrorists. Gerbils can smell terror in adrenaline so people thought of having a cubical that people walked through which had a fan that blew your smell towards a gerbil in a cage. The gerbil would then press a button to show that the suspect was frightened. It didn't work.
- Tangent: The gerbils most used as pets in Britain are Mongolian gerbils. As they are desert animals their poo is dry and not smelly.
- General Ignorance
- The people who stopped flying the Jolly Roger in 2003 were British Navy submariners. When submarines were first used by the navy generals they thought they were an unfair way of fighting. The crews played up to their roguish roles and flew Jolly Roger flags in a pirate-like way after successful missions. It was stopped because it was feared that the crews were glorifying war. Also the navy wanted to make subs more secret so they stopped flying the flags.
Episode 3 "Games"
- Broadcast date
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Phill – An impression of John Anderson saying "Gladiators ready!"
- Sean – An American sports-style buzzer
- Liza – Football crowd cheering with commentator shouting "Goal!"
- Alan – An impression of Bruce Forsyth saying "Good game, good game."
- Theme
- Each panellist is given a Bang! banner gun during the first question.
- Topics
- Tangent: Nash was portrayed by Russell Crowe in the film A Beautiful Mind.
- Tangent: Another example of game theory was used in a final of Big Brother.
- Ouija became the most popular board game in America in the early 70s, but went out of fashion in 1972 because of the film The Exorcist. Parker Brothers still own the rights to all ouija boards. Only one-third of people nowadays use the ouija board to contact the dead. During World War I, it was used to give messages to troops abroad.
- Tangent: In 1995 a British court dismissed a jury because it used a ouija board to contact the dead person in the case.
- Tangent: There is an Elvis Presley séance website.
- Tangent: Amongst the "Scallywags" were Michael Foot, George Orwell and J. B. Priestley and they were trained to kill anyone who collaborated with the Nazis. Their motto was "Terror By Night".
- Tangent: Boy Scouts at ages 12 to 14 were taught at Osterley Park (where the Home Guard trained) how to decapitate motorists using a taut wire stretched across a road. British roller skating champion Harry Lee also taught them how to knee someone in the groin while using roller skates.
- Gladiators were either vegetarians or vegans. A mass grave of gladiators was found in Ephesus and gave all indications that they didn't eat meat, they were known as barleymen: from "horeardii", meaning "eaters of barley".
- Tangent: Bulls are the strongest animal vegetarians, but almost every animal is a vegetarian.
- Tangent: Adolf Hitler wasn't a vegetarian.
- Since 1633 all Venice gondolas have to be black, any decoration on them is allowed, but the body has to be painted black.
- Card counting is actually not illegal, but a way of playing the game well. It was devised by Ben Campbell, whose MIT Blackjack Team who used the skill to win money at Blackjack.
- Tangent: Casinos have introduced a facial recognition system to identify card counters, so that any time they go into a casino anywhere in the world they're instantly recognised.
- In poker, the easiest way to tell if someone is bluffing is to try to spot their tell, which normally involves blinking. Gamblers usually try double-bluffing to faze an opponent.
- General Ignorance
- Greyhounds are actually blue in colour, not grey. The word "greyhound" is derived from "grighound", which means a "bitch hound".
- Tangent: Greyhound racing is the second most popular spectator sport in the UK, £2.5 billion is wagered on the sport every year.
- Tangent: Kenneth Gandar-Dower once tried to see who would win in a race between a cheetah and a greyhound.
- Mussels which don't open are safe to eat. Food writer Jane Grigson wrote a book on seafood in which she created the myth that you should throw them away if they don't open. Ones which are open are likely to be dead.
- At the beginning of tournaments, Roman gladiators never said anything (forfeit: "We who are about to die salute you"). Only prisoners of the Emperor Claudius were believed to have said "We who are about to die salute you".
- XL Extras
- Tangent: Many people believe that altruism between humans is genetic proof of game theory. It is better for people to share than keep it to themselves.
- Tangent: A rock climber once had to cut off his arm because it was trapped between 2 rocks and he knew no-one was around to save him.
- Tangent: Children who are taught to share at an early age will make new connections in the brain.
- Tangent: Phill once died on stage at the Royal Albert Hall. He was comic support for The Who.
- Tangent: When blindfolded people still make words on Ouija Boards. However, if you turn the board upside-down without them knowing they write rubbish.
- The contest that can end in either a checkmate or knockout is chess-boxing.
- Tangent: Alan went to see the swimming at the 2004 Summer Olympics in Athens, but thought it was rubbish because he had no idea what was going on.
- The first prize in the Mayan ball game tournament was to be sacrificed to the sun god. The captain would have their heart removed and burnt. The game was played for 3000 years, firstly around 1400 BC. In 700 AD King 18-Rabbit changed the rules so the losing team was sacrificed.
- Tangent: To win at roulette you can use a laser scanner on a mobile phone to calculate where the ball will land and bet during the last minute.
- Tangent: Poker legend Amarillo Slim once said If you can tell my poker hand just by looking I will let you shit in this hat.
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: Alan did a documentary in Nambia where a baby cheetah had been bought to a reserve. To teach it the skills needed to hunt they had a motor with a cord and pulleys which zigzagged around a field with a rag attached to it. They also drove a pick-up truck containing horsemeat and the cheetah jogged alongside at 30 mph. Cheetahs only eat fresh meat, unlike leopards which will eat rotten meat.
- Tangent: Sean was in Barcelona and ate some clams. His wife said that they did not smell right but he ignored her. He ended up with terrible food poisoning. Two weeks later he thought he was O.K and had some razor clams. He was sick again. He is now worried he has an allergy to clams for life.
Episode 4 "Geography"
- Broadcast date
- 17 December 2009
- 23 December 2009 (XL edition)
- 14 April 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Topics
- Every year 300,000 insurance claims made are blamed on faulty Sat-navs (forfeit: "Are we nearly there yet?").
- Tangent: A Syrian lorry driver was going from Turkey to Gibraltar, but his sat-nav directed him to Grimsby
- Tangent: Jimmy's girlfriend once said Where would we be without Satnav.
- Tangent: Rob does his impression of a man trapped in a box.
- Tangent: People who have done sat-nav voices include John Cleese, Joanna Lumley, Julian Clary, Nigella Lawson, Billy Connolly, Julie Walters, Simon Cowell, Catherine Tate and Margaret Thatcher.
- Tangent: Some musicians had to be rescued by a helicopter, because their van was directing them through a ford.
- Genghis Khan is buried next to a baby camel, as the grave had to be anonymous and mother camels know where their babies have died.
- Tangent: According to Marco Polo, 20,000 people were executed to keep the Khan's burial place secret, including all the slaves who excavated the grave and all the soldiers who killed the slaves.
- Tangent: Genghis Khan was married 500 times. It is said that 8% of all males in Central Asia are related to a common ancestor from around 1,000 years ago who may be Genghis Khan.
- The Chinese invented the teacup because they liked drinking tea over other drinks, and as a result never manufactured glass. Europeans invented glass firstly to make wine glasses, which led to the invention of, among others, the lens, spectacles, beakers and flasks, which increased intellectualism.
- In 1851, James Wyld installed a 60-foot high scale model of the Earth in the middle of London. It included all the land masses and all the seas and mountains, built to scale and perfectly inverted. It was situated in Leicester Square between 1851 and 1862, originally to coincide with The Great Exhibition of 1851 in Hyde Park.
- The Arctic Highlanders (otherwise known as the Inughuit or Polar Eskimos) got their cutlery from meteorites (forfeits: Sheffield; IKEA).
- Tangent: An explorer called Ross (after whom the Ross Sea is named) became the first person to encounter them. Up until that point, the Inughuit thought they were the only people on the planet.
- Tangent: Admiral Peary, the first person to reach the North Pole, around 70 years after Ross first reached the Arctic. Peary took from the Inughuit's: their meteorites (which he sold to a museum for US$40,000), six Inughuit children, four of whom died of Tuberculosis immediately. One of the surviving children eventually saw his parents as skeletons at the American Museum of Natural History in New York City.
- Tangent: The Carib cannibals, who had eaten the last of the Atures.
- Tangent: Von Humboldt was a homosexual.
- Tangent: Parrots can learn up to 200 words, but they only mimic humans.
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: Groningen claims to have had a pub that opened non-stop for 10 years.
- Church Flatts Farm in Derbyshire is the furthest point from the sea in the whole UK (70 miles (110 km)).
- The national anthem of Spain (Marcha Real) is not sung in any language (forfeits: Spanish; Catalan), it's an instrumental piece. The old lyrics, inspired by Franco, were dropped after his death in 1975.
- Tangent: They were inspired to create new lyrics for the anthem after listening to Liverpool F.C. fans singing "You'll Never Walk Alone". A competition for new words was held but withdrawn after five days for being too nationalistic.
- Tangent: National anthems with controversial lines include this from La Marseillaise: "Do you hear in the countryside, those ferocious soldiers roaring? They come up to your arms, to slit the throats of your sons and wives!" The 6th verse of God Save the Queen has the line "rebellious Scots to crush!" The current Dutch national anthem has "To the King of Spain, I've granted a lifelong loyalty" as they were part of the Spanish Netherlands 350 years ago.
- QI XL Extras
- It is believed that the Mongol hordes amounted to 2,000,000 people, but they managed to kill 50,000,000 of their enemies. Their main advantage was that they had short bows that could be easily carried around in the saddles of their horses, which they would ride on for days.
- The world's driest lake is the Bonneville Salt Flats in Utah, famous for being the place where land speed records are set: so flat that you can actually see the curvature of the Earth. The world's smallest mountain range is the Sacramento Mountains of California. The world's wettest desert is the Sonoran Desert.
- Tangent: The official U.S. difference between a hill and a mountain is that mountains are at least 1,000 feet high from base to apex while in the UK it is 600 yards above sea level. The definition of a desert is that it's a place where more water is lost than falls.
- Tangent: The Mediterranean was once the driest lake in the world, until, in the late Miocene era six million years ago, the water from the Atlantic Ocean came over the Rock of Gibraltar, which caused the Mediterranean to flood and the Rock of Gibraltar to crumble.
- Tangent: Barbary monkeys are actually miscalled Barbary apes.
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- One has been found that is 250 miles long, 60 miles wide, and one mile deep.
- The bits that break off from glaciers are known as calves.
- They can travel up to 65 feet a day, although one in Pakistan did seven and a half miles in three months.
- One was spotted on a mountain near Uganda and the Congo.
- *The only things that live in glaciers are ice worms, which live on red algae. In one glacier they found more worms within than there are people living on the planet.
- Tangent: There are no snakes in Ireland because of glaciation, as snakes can't survive in freezing temperatures.
- Since 1856, the United States has the legal right to seize any territory where there is a supply of guano (forfeit: oil), which is the droppings of birds who have eaten anchovies in Peru. In the 19th century guano was as valuable as gold: it was used as a very rich fertilizer.
- Tangent: Guano once contributed 75% of the economy of Peru.
- Tangent: Its properties were first discovered by the aforementioned Alexander von Humboldt.
- Tangent: It takes 5lbs of anchovies to make 1lb of farmed salmon.
- Tangent: The fourth best-selling book of all-time, Green Eggs and Ham, has a vocabulary of only 50 words.
Episode 5 "Groovy" (Christmas Special)
- Broadcast date
- 24 December 2009
- 29 December 2009 (XL edition)
- 21 April 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Theme
- The studio is decorated with silver Christmas decorations.
- Topics
- Buttercup the QI cow demonstrates the way a certain animal walks: with both right feet moving at the same time, then both left feet at the same time. The only animals that walk like this are giraffes and camels; cows and horses walk with their front legs bending as they move forward. The first person to show how horses walk was Eadweard Muybridge, the British cinematographer, in his book Animal Locomotion.
- Tangent: Muybridge murdered his love rival in cold blood. He became the first person in American legal forensic history to claim insanity as his defence for a murder charge.
- People don't seem to mind queue bargers as much as you think. As proved by the Milgram experiment as well as the Breaching experiment, observing 129 lines in railway stations and betting shops. The experiments showed that on only 10% of occasions was a queue barger asked to leave or admonished, and that 50% of the time people only did as much as tut.
- Tangent: A discussion about lane mergers and bar-jumpers. In America, they refer to lane-merging as "like a zip!"
- Tangent: David's annoyance at people with more than 5 items going in the "5 items or less" queue in supermarkets.
- Tangent: During World War I, a tank toured Britain to help raise money for the war effort. It raised the most money from Glasgow
- Many words that were believed to have originated in the jazz era, such as "cool", "groovy", "hip", "hep", "chick", "cat", "dude", "foxy" and "wicked" seem to have originated much earlier: as early as 1895 and as late as 1933.
- A Mormon can only have one wife (forfeit: many). Joseph Smith, founder of the Latter Day Saint movement, had a divine revelation which said that he could have as many wives as he liked, but this was stopped by the US government.
- Tangent: When a law was passed in America to make polygamy illegal, the head of the LDS Church had another divine revelation saying it should stop.
- Tangent: Discussion about The Osmonds (the world's most famous Mormons).
- General Ignorance
- The Beatles album Help! features the group spelling out NUJV (forfeit: "Help") in flag semaphore on the front cover. The photographer Robert Freeman wanted to spell out HELP, but he didn't like that arrangement visually.
- Tangent: This became one of the Beatles conspiracy theories: some believed that NUJV stood for New Unknown John Vocalist.
- Tangent: Another conspiracy theory is Paul McCartney being barefoot on the Abbey Road cover.
- Tangent: The origin of Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds comes from a picture painted by Julian Lennon, at playgroup, of his friend Lucy. It wasn't until much later on that any of the Beatles realised that the initials of the title spelt out LSD.
- Robert Burns did not write Auld Lang Syne, it was a traditional song that he had written down. It was first mentioned in 1724 (although "Old Long Syne" was fairly different before Burns adapted it), 35 years before Burns was born. This was introduced by Stephen's Burns Unit Joke (forfeit: (the joke) isn't funny).
- Tangent: It's popular in the Far East; in Japan it's used daily to signal the closing of most large department stores.
- Tangent: Burns was never referred to as Robbie or Rabbie Burns. He signed himself as Robin, Rab or Robert.
- QI XL Extras
- Tangent: The penny-farthing was known as an ordinary bicycle in its day. Most bikes in the old days were considerably taller than the bikes of today. The first regular-sized bikes with chain drive mechanisms were known as dwarf safeties. The Clark brothers built a tall bike, known as a "flood bike", that could ride through floodwater.
- Tangent: Nowadays, many tall bikes are used in jousting, whereby lances would be attached to the bikes.
- Up until July 2008, it was legal to smoke tobacco in Dutch coffee shops or libraries. Mixing tobacco with cannabis would have resulted in a fine.
- Tangent: The first smoking ban took place in Nazi Germany in 1933. Adolf Hitler referred to smoking as "the wrath of the Red Indian Man against the White Man, for having been given hard liquor." He even suggested that Nazism might not have worked had he not given up smoking.
- Tangent: The earliest known smoking ban was in 1640 when Czar Michael of Russia declared it a "deadly sin". People who did it were flogged and had their lips slit. James I of England wrote a pamphlet about smoking called "A Counterblaste to Tobacco", in which he damned tobacco, mainly citing it as being bad for the eyes, lungs and nose.
- Tangent: Lee accidentally ate a hash brownie in Amsterdam.
- Tangent: Fly agaric mushrooms in Siberia are eaten by reindeer, and it makes them bounce around. It's believed that's where the idea of the flying reindeer came from. It's highly toxic to humans, so they would drink the urine of the reindeer to avoid the poison.
- Tangent: The correct term for the magic mushroom is psilocybin. Experiments involving magic mushrooms seem to try and prove that some religious experiences are based on hallucinations.
- Tangent: Magic mushrooms were re-discovered by Albert Hofmann. He more famously discovered LSD. To test it, he took what he thought was a small dose, but it turned out to be a thousand times more potent than he expected. He described his experience as if he were demonically possessed. It was also believed that Hofmann was involved in a CIA operation known as Project MKULTRA, which tried to see if LSD could be used as a truth drug.
Episode 6 "Genius"
- Broadcast date
- 1 January 2010
- 2 January 2010 (XL edition)
- 28 April 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Theme
- Each of the panellists are seen wearing stereotypical 'nerdy glasses' at the start of the show, whereas Alan has some coke-bottle ones.
- Topics
- The nostrils control your ability to do certain tasks. By blocking the left nostril you should be better at being able to do visual and spatial things, whereas, if the right nostril is blocked, you should be better at being able to do verbal things. According to the Spielberger State Anxiety Inventory, the right nostril makes you more emotionally negative as well.
- Tangent: Athletes usually wear a nasal strip while playing sports, which means they are at their most verbally dextrous
- Graham's number, a number devised by Ronald Graham, which is so big that all the material in the universe couldn't make enough ink to write it out, but scientists know that it ends in a "7"
- Children find IQ test easier is because they do more problem solving in life than their parents did.
- Tangent: The Flynn effect was designed to try and bring the scores up above the IQ of 70, because in America you cannot be executed for a capital crime if your IQ was below normal
- Geniuses might be bred through eugenics, a form of selective human breeding, which was also used by the Nazis.
- Tangent: Someone who sort of bred a genius was Leonardo da Vinci's brother Bartolomeo.
- Tangent: Graham talks about the time that he hosted an American game show and a female contestant said that her father was a serial killer.
- The first animal to be cloned was a sea urchin, which was cloned in 1885 by the German Driesch.
- Tangent: In 1902 Hans Spemann cloned a salamander. Dolly the sheep was cloned in 1996, she was named after Dolly Parton, because the cells came from a mammary gland.
- Tangent: The first cloned cat came from the cat, Rainbow, but its clone looked nothing like the original. It was called CC, which was short for "CopyCat". The first clone dog was the South Korean dog, Snuppy.
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: Darwin was one of 5 non-royal people to have be buried at Westminster Abbey.
- QI XL Extras
- There is no proof that making babies listen to music like Mozart makes them brainier.
- Tangent: Mozart was so talented at a young age that he regularly entertained for people in the House of Bourbon and the House of Hohenzollern.
- Tangent: "Thomas Linley played a concerto at a younger age than Mozart did, died aged 22 when he drowned.
- Tangent: Mensa is Latin for "table".
- The Last Supper is decaying badly because Leonardo painted it on dry plaster. The bottom of it was destroyed, so a door was put in at the point where Jesus' legs would've been.
- Tangent: If da Vinci's helicopter had been built, it wouldn't have worked.
- Tongue rolling has nothing to do with genetics. There is a similar connection with the connection between the smell of your urine after eating asparagus. It used to be known as "housemaid's despair".
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: "Dog cakes", cat shows, Crufts and TV coverage of golf.
Episode 7 "Girls and Boys"
- Broadcast date
- 8 January 2010
- 9 January 2010 (XL edition)
- 5 May 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Sandi – A woman singing a rising and falling scale
- Ronni – A harp glissando
- Jack – A wolf-whistle
- Alan – A man shouting, "'Ello darlin'!"
- Topics
- Up until the 20th century, baby boys wore pink and baby girls wore blue. Boys at that time were also referred to as girls. In 1900, Dressmaker Magazine said "The preferred colour to dress young boys in is pink. Blue is reserved for girls as it is presumed paler and the more dainty of the two colours, and pink is thought to be stronger". In 1927, Princess Astrid of Belgium caused controversy when she gave birth to a girl, as "the cradle had been optimistically outfitted in pink, the colour for boys". It was believed that blue was more serene and paler, hence it was used for girls. Up until the mid-15th century, all children were referred to as girls. Boys were known as "knave girls" and girls were known as "gay girls". Only in recent times, has calling a boy been referred to a male child, before that it meant a servant.
- Tangent: Female monkeys are attracted to pink because of the pink faces of the young primates.
- Tangent: It's believed that if someone is picking up a child, that's not theirs, if the child is dressed in pink, they'd be hugged inwards, and if the child is dressed in blue, they'd be hugged outwards.
- Tangent: An experiment with baby chimpanzees showed that when given the choice of which toy to play with, either a toy truck or a doll, the baby boys all chose the truck and the baby girls all chose the doll.
- Tangent: The traje de luces, the suit worn by a torero (a matador) in a bullfight, is often pink. It means "suit of light".
- Tangent: Pink doesn't appear on the spectrum, it's an extra-spectral colour. It's said that girls head towards the red side of a rainbow, whereas boys head towards the blue sky.
- Tangent: It's also believed that nine-tenths of the food collected by hunter-gatherers were provided by women.
- At the moment, it's believed that the best way to get a baby girl is to have a low-calorie diet. A study was done and out of 100 people who had had a high-calorie diet, 56 gave birth to a boy. Women who had at least one bowl of breakfast cereal a day were 87% more likely to have a boy than women who ate no more than one bowl a week. On average, women who had boys had roughly 400 more calories daily than those who had girls. Women who were infected with Hepatitis B were 1½ times more likely to have a boy. The only known certain way is by embryo selection, which is popular in America and Thailand. It costs around US$18,000. Aristotle believed that the diet of the mother and the sex position at conception made the difference. Anaxagoras thought that boys and girls came from different testicles, so if you tied up one testicle, it would guarantee you the other one. The Talmud suggest lining up the bed north-south before sex, if you want a boy. The French suggest wearing boots to bed would get you a boy.
- Tangent: Alan tells the story of an English couple who went to Thailand to have their baby. A Thai woman told them, "if you look lovely when you're pregnant, you have girl, if you look tired and ugly, dress badly, you have baby boy." She then asked what she thought she'd have and the Thai woman replied, "Boy", and she had a baby boy.
- Tangent: Sandi tells of the time when her son brought a friend round and he asked "What's it like having two mummies?", he replied, "It's marvellous, if one of them's poorly, you've still got one to do for you".
- The reason that there are fewer female guests on QI is because women laugh less at other women, despite the fact that they laugh more than men, although audiences in general laugh more at men. It is believed that men make prats of themselves more often than women, although Lucille Ball and Goldie Hawn are two examples of women who can do that. As stand-up comedy was getting more popular during the 1980s, women portray women, but men didn't portray men, so women treated themselves as a minority, even though they are 51% of the population. Germaine Greer famously said, "there are only two things that women don't do as well as men, and that's design dresses and cook" considering that nearly all the great chefs and couturiers are men, whereas it was the traditional role of women to cooks and sew.
- In China, Nü Shu is a form of writing devised in Jiangyong County, Hunan Province. It was a writing form that only women could understand. Since, women in China were not taught properly at all, they needed a secret code of writing. Nü Shu is a phonetic type of writing. When a woman in one of these secret friendship groups got married, they were given a book in which they would leave some blank pages, so they could write their secret thoughts down, which only women could read. They would send them, because they could never meet in their groups often, because they had bound feet. Foot binding involved 5 year olds breaking all the bones in their feet, so they could wrap their feet round themselves and then be wrapped up to be around 3 inches. Many of them would rot and many died of gangrene. This went on for around 1,000 years. They would also write using tapestries.
- Tangent: In the Bantu language, there is a rule that states that is someone got married, the female would no longer be allowed to use any syllable that was in the male's name, because it is a language of respect that women have to use. Another secret language is Pig Latin, where the first syllable is put to the end of the word with the sound ay', so "Quite Interesting" becomes "Itequay Interestingay". In Germany, they have "Löffelsprache", which means "spoon speak", the French have "Louchébem", the Bulgarians have "Pileshki" and the Japanese is "Ba-bi-bu-be-bo". There's also a camp High church nonsense language where the Holy Communion are referred to as "haggers commagers" and also say "Oooh, Jessica Christ".
- Tangent: A discussion about teenagers sounding the same in just about every language. Also, the fact that teenagers never look at you, when you ask them to look at you.
- Tangent: Clownfish (made popular in the film, Finding Nemo) are known to be very fierce, but they're also immune to sea anemones. They actually form a bond with the sea anemones and have their babies there. They also have gender assignation, which means they can change their gender in later life. If there's a group of fish consisting of a strong female and male, along with several weak males, when the female dies, the strong male becomes female and one of the weaklings becomes the "alpha male".
- General Ignorance
- It's impossible to tell a woman from a man just by looking at them. It was believed that the easiest way to tell them apart was by the fact that women don't have Adam's apples, but they do. Even so, a good ladyboy can just about imitate anything female.
- Men are better at map reading than women because of grey matter and white matter (forfeit: they're not). Using MRI scans on men and women with equal IQ, they found that men use 6½ more grey matter than women, whereas women used 9 times more white matter than men. Grey matter is central to processing information for intellectual thought, such as map reading and mathematics. White matter connects the processing information to emotional thought such as language speaking and multitasking.
- Tangent: People being annoying when asking for directions.
- The prize money given out at Wimbledon is unfair to male competitors (forfeit: nothing (is unfair about it)). When it began in 1884, the ladies' winner got a 20 guinea silver flower basket and the men's champion got a 30 guinea gold trophy. In 2006, Amélie Mauresmo won £625,000 for playing 142 games, whereas Roger Federer got £655,000 for playing 202 games. The women therefore got more money, because the short matches allowed them to play in doubles tournaments as well. The rate per game in 2005 was £1,432 per game for the top 8 women, whereas the top 8 men got £993 per game. The prize money is equal in terms of money, but not equal as the men have to play more tennis.
- QI XL Extras
- Tangent: Sandi tells of her love for the colour pink.
- Tangent: Sandi's theory about stamina and the speed of sperm, followed by a discussion about the fact that girls have no sperm at all.
- Tangent: Alan's suggestion that if you're watching football on television, you'll more likely have a boy. This also leads to a discussion about using remote controls and reading magazines during sex.
- The most violent women in history are the Amazons of Dahomey, now known as Benin. They were a group of female warriors whose job was to protect the king. They were nominal wives of the king, but they were celibate. They were chosen for being aggressive, but their husbands could nominate their wife, if he thought she was a nag. They carried a switchblade that was capable of cutting a man in two. Some sources say that they were turned into men and made to despise women, whereas others say that venerated, they had slave girls with them carrying a bell, while men had to avert their eyes.
- Tangent: Marco Polo suggested that Khutulun, the niece of Kublai Khan, was the most fiercest of all warriors, and she suggested that anyone who wanted to marry her had to wrestle her. If he won, he'd marry her, but if he lost, he'd have to give 100 horses to her. She eventually gained 10,000 horses this way and never married.
- Tangent: In the United Kingdom, crime committed by women has gone up 25% over the last 3 years, whereas there was a 2% drop for men. It's believed that alcohol is a main component of this, because 50% of their testosterone get sourced through their blood while they're drunk.
- Tangent: Discussion about girl bullying by text messaging. Sandi then tells of the first time she came to the UK, after being thrown out of an American school at age 14. She went to boarding school for 6 weeks, and no-one talked to her because of her New York accent. She managed to make it more British by watching the film, Brief Encounter. This leads to Stephen saying that if he was getting bullied at school, he'd tell them not to, because it would give him an erection.
- The connection between grannies and Killer Whales is the menopause. Killer Whales are the only other animals apart from human that have a massive gap between menopause and death, hence the happy and active lives they live. Killer Whales are also matrilineal, so the females keep the life cycle going, as they provide most of the nutrition.
- Tangent: Killer Whales can kill their own handlers. Sandi's granny got taken out of three care homes for bad behaviour.
- Tangent: Sandi's mum grew up in Maidstone, Kent during the Battle of Britain, and all the terraced houses on her street were bombed apart from hers, she asked her mother why it wasn't and she replied "Granny wouldn't have allowed it". This leads to Sandi's suggestion that the army should be just grannies.
- There was an urban myth during the 1940s that the Nazis disguised themselves as nuns with hairy hands during World War II. It was believed that they would parachute in and people in Britain were told to watch out for nuns from the South coast coming up on buses, trains or the London Underground on their way up to the Scottish Highlands. Their cover would be blown when paying fares, because it revealed the hairiness of their hands and forearms and in some cases, a tattoo of Adolf Hitler on their arm. Other ways to test if soldiers were German was to make them speak English, especially some very odd surnames, such as Featherstonehaugh (pronounced "Fanshawe"), Cholmondeley (pronounced "Chumley"), Berekely (pronounced "Barkly"), Mainwaring (pronounced "Mannering") and Belvoir (pronounced "Beaver").
- Tangent: Female moustaches and Alan's grey pubic hair.
- Tangent: The Tollemache family. They were a double-barrelled family, so they were the Tollemache-Tollemaches, but it was pronounced "Toolmake-Tollmash". One of their family had the longest name of any person in the British Army, Leone Sextus Denys Oswolf Fraudatifilius Tollemache-Tollemache de Orellana Plantagenet Tollemache-Tollemache. His elder brither was Lyulph Ydwallo Odin Nestor Egbert Lyonel Toedmag Hugh Erchenwyne Saxon Esa Cromwell Orma Neville Dysart Plantagenet Tollemache-Tollemache. His initials spelt out LYONEL THE SECOND.
Episode 8 "Germany"
- Broadcast date
- 15 January 2010
- 16 January 2010 (XL edition)
- 12 May 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Theme
- Topics
- Tangent: The whole notion about Germans "hogging the sunloungers" is supposedly a myth according to a the German writer Ralf Höcker who did a study, which said that the Germans weren't even aware that this thing was associated with them, but a survey done by Halifax Travel Insurance in 2009 showed that the Germans followed by the British were the most likely to reserve sunloungers. This leads to Jo telling a story about crashing into a sunlounger after a confrontation with some fat Germans.
- Tangent: The other German stereotype is the fact that they are so efficient, which they themselves believe, but they think that the British think they are lederhosen wearing beer drinkers. The 6 major thoughts that the Germans think that the British are untidy, split into mobs, obsessed with royalty, drink tea all the time, are rather reserved and can't cook.
- During the 2006 FIFA World Cup in Germany, the German authorities confiscated all the Dutch fans' orange Leeuwenhosen because they were sponsored by Bavaria Brewery, which wasn't the official beer sponsor of the World Cup, that was Budweiser. These Leeuwenhosen had big pockets for beer, and had a lion's tail, "Leeuwenhosen" means "lion-pants", just as "Lederhosen" means "leather trousers". They were coloured orange, because of their official royal house, the House of Nassau. So, since they were confiscated before their first match against the Ivory Coast many fans watched the game in their underpants. Other examples of this include at Wimbledon, when a woman had her yoghurt confiscated because it wasn't the official yoghurt of Wimbledon.
- Tangent: Sean claims that the reason why Premier League footballers get booked for taking their shirt off is because that's when the sponsors are in full view, so by taking them off the sponsors get less coverage.
- Tangent: Lederhosen originated in the 18th century when it was decided that the upper classes would ape the peasantry and have expensive wedding and country feasts where they pretended to be extravagant, like Marie Antoinette pretended to be a milkmaid with her silver curls.
- Tangent: Rob shows off his "half-hose" socks, which Jo says make him look like a "knobhead". Rob then asks the audience if they think it's cool, with the majority disagreeing.
- Tangent: In America, there are a group of people known as the Pennsylvania Dutch, who are descended from the Rhineland and Switzerland. The reason they are referred to as "Dutch", is because the word "Deutsch" which is German for "German" is correctly used as the word "Dutch", so "Dutch" is "Deutsch". The other reason is the "Dutch Dutch" (or the Hollanders) fought Britain many times and eventually invaded England. (Forfeit: don't mention the war (Jo - although she tried to pass the buck on to Stephen!))
- The most repeated television show of all time is the British film, Dinner for One. The show is shown on every German television channel on 31 December, since 1972. It stars Freddie Frinton as a butler who has to serve a Christmas dinner for his mistress, played by May Warden. He pretends there are others there and actually gets drunk while pouring out drinks for these "guests". It's a massive tradition in Germany. It was originally done as a sketch in 1920, which toured round the halls. A German television presenter saw it in 1963, and asked if it could be done in Germany, which it was. The next year it was recorded, and since 1972, it's been shown all time on 31 December. It also spread to Austria and Denmark and other surrounding areas. It's dialogue included the now-popular catchphrase, "Same procedure as every year".
- According to Godwin's Rule of Nazi analogies (named after Mike Godwin, the general counsel of the Wikimedia Foundation), "As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1." In other words, if Hitler is involved in an argument on a message thread, then that thread is at an end, and the person who uses the analogy has lost the argument. An example of this is that Hitler hated fox hunting, so he banned it, which means it must be good, etc.
- Tangent: During the discussion, a picture is shown of Hitler wearing socks similar to what Rob is wearing.
- Monopoly board games were used to escape from prison. A man called "Clutty" Hutton bought some Monopoly boards and through the help of MI9 had help turn them into escape kits, which were sold through bogus charities. Amongst the items were real money mixed with the fake Monopoly money, maps on silk, because paper was too bulky and rustly, whereas you could get much more detail on silk. His earlier work involved putting compasses into military tunic buttons. The Germans got wind of it, and worked out that the button could be unscrewed, so then the thread was reversed, so it became tighter as they tried to unscrew it, but then they got wind of that, so razor blades were put in that were magnetized at one end, so when they were attached to something metal, the "G" of Gillette would always point north. They were also given wettened blankets that could be made into greatcoats using it like a tailor's template, as well as pens with sacks of dye in them to make many different colours and playing cards that when dipped in water, could be peeled to reveal money. (Forfeit: Get out of jail free)
- Tangent: Rob's idea to use giant Jengas to get prisoners out of prison, followed by Alan's idea of using snakes and ladders.
- General Ignorance
- Trick question: Who wrote Brideshead Revisited? (Forfeit: Evelyn War, taken as mentioning the war (Sean))
- The panellists are shown a picture of a German Shepherd Dog. They were known as Alsatians up until 1977, mainly because at the time people resented anything with the word "German" in it, so they were called Schäferhund or Alsatian Wolfhounds, then just Alsatians, which was coined in 1918. Alan then reveals that he had a German Shepherd, which killed his next door neighbour's dog.
- The Munich Oktoberfest is held mainly in September, although it is occasionally partly in October, depending on how the months are arranged. It's believed the world's biggest continuous festival. Over 6 million people cram into it every year. They drink 6,940,600 litres of beer during the festival.
- Tangent: Alan tells of the time that he went to the 1998 FIFA World Cup in Bordeaux, France, where some temporary bars were built up in the city, and when Scotland played Norway, the Scots drank more beer that weekend then the entire population of Bordeaux drink in a year. Each of the bars only sold lager, and there were no food stalls and no toilets. One of the drunk Scots then mistook Alan for Alan Partridge.
- The panellists are asked to name what's wrong with this extract from the song My Favourite Things:
- Cream-coloured ponies and crisp apple strudels, doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles.
- The answer is "schnitzel with noodles", as they are never eaten together. There is a possibility that the popularity of the song has meant that some people eat it, but it's just because of the song. The lyrics of the song were done by Rodgers and Hammerstein. The film ends with the family crossing the border, not into Switzerland, but into Bavaria, near Hitler's private house, but then they walked the 100 kilometres down to Innsbruck and got to the border with Italy the day before it was shut.
- QI XL Extras
- There are some words for which there is no literal translation in the English language, so words are borrowed from other languages.
- Schadenfreude means "pleasure in the misfortune of others".
- Gemütlichkeit means "cosiness". It's mainly used in Austria and Bavaria. "Gemütlich" people are also said to be very kind to their neighbours. In 1973, a British man sued a holiday firm because he didn't receive any "gemülichkeit", as promised and he won. It actually set a precedent in English contract law.
- Zugzwang is a chess term, which means that you are forced to move, even though it might weaken your position, because in chess, you can't skip your turn after your opponent makes one, you have to move, even though your position might be worse than when you started.
- Zeitgeist means "spirit of the age", or "time spirit/ghost".
- Tangent: Another of these loanwords id Gesundheit, which means "soundness" or "health".
- The panellists are shown a ghost-like object, a SPUK, which is a device that is put on the underside of the toilet seat, and when it's raised it give off a voice message which tries to force German people to sit down on the toilet seat to urinate, rather than stand up. SPUK is an acronym for StehPinkler Unter Kontrolle. "Stehpinkeln" in German means to stand urinating, whereas "Sitzpinkeln" means to "sit urinating".
- Tangent: Rob tells of how when he sits down on the toilet, his half-hose falls down to his ankles, if he's wearing something like a jumbo cord. Sean then says that when he's on the toilet, he takes his glasses off and puts them on his pants as a sort of hammock, but then he sometimes forgets they're there and they get "rammed into his under-regions".
- In Germany, they have a thing called the "Nacktputzservice", in which naked German students are hired to do hoovering and housework. It originated from the Freikörperkultur (or FKK), which meant "free body culture". It was widespread in Germany until Hermann Göring put a stop to it during the 1930s, when he trained the police to stop people from going round naked. But, since then German hikers near open areas in Switzerland and Poland just like to go round naked. The Swiss and Poles both find it disgusting. There are designated nude beaches in Germany, and the Englischer Garten in Munich has a designated nudist area, as well as Berlin's biggest park, the Tiergarten. (Forfeit: don't mention the war (Sean))
- Tangent: Sean says that is he were a nudist, he'd put a bit of toilet paper up his bottom and see if anyone noticed.
- Uncle Wiggly Wings was a pilot who helped children during the Berlin Airlift in the Cold War. The Russians had sealed off all transport routes to West Berlin in 1948, when it was under Allied control in the centre of the Russian Sector. The whole city was cut off from the rest of the world for a year, so the British & Americans dropped food from planes to help the people below. One pilot gave 2 kids some chewing gum and promised he'd return and give them some more candy. The next day he wiggled his wings and dropped chocolate and more and more children kept coming, and it became a mass propaganda coup, which became known as "Operation Little Vittles". The sweets came down in little handkerchief-style parachutes. 2,223,000 tons of supplies were dropped during the airlift. (Forfeit: don't mention the war (Sean × 2))
- General Ignorance
- In Germany, at 11:11 on 11 November every year, the Germans celebrate the start of their Carnival, which lasts all the way up to Ash Wednesday. It starts off quietly through November and December, partially due to Christmas, but by the time the Mardi Gras arrives, everything is in full flow. The word "carnival" doesn't mean "goodbye to meat", as believed, but actually means "to remove meat from your diet", from the words "carne levare". (Forfeit: don't mention the war (Alan))
Episode 9 "Gallimaufrey"
The full episode title "A Gallimaufrey of Gingambobs", means "an absurd medley of testicles".
- Broadcast date
- 22 January 2010
- 23 January 2010 (XL edition)
- 19 May 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Topics
- Captain Schlitt of German submarine U-1206 caused his U-boat to sink because of a problem he had involving the toilet in the submarine. The problem with toilet in submersible vehicles is that they can't work like toilets on aeroplanes and trains, because of the obvious dangers with being underwater. Special training is actually needed to operate it properly. On 14 April 1945, Schlitt went to the toilet to do a poo, and he claimed that the toilet flush wasn't working properly, but there is a theory that he just did a rather unpleasant poo and didn't want to ask the person who did the flushing to come in, so he did it himself and got it wrong and filled the submarine with sewage and water, which then lead to the power source, a huge acid battery, which therefore created toxic chlorine gas, so they had to surface to vent the gas, but they spotted and blown out of the water.
- The handwriting of each panellist is shown.
- A graphologist would say of Andy's that because it's mostly joined up, it's of a "logical, systematic thinker", since some words are spaced out, he is "open, honest, but deep in thought", and "sociable", because of the slightly forward slant to the right.
- Alan's would be described as "unstable", because of the close lettering, "does things without thinking", because the letters aren't mostly joined up.
- Hugh's would be described as "artistic and intuitive", because most, but not all of the letters are joined up, but because it's upright, it also shows "self-control, egoism and coldness".
- Phill's would be described as also having "self-control, egoism and coldness", "unstable" and "does things without thinking".
Stephen then explains that there wasn't much point in doing this because the British Psychological Society says that graphology as a way of interpreting character has zero validity. It's also not allowed in American courts either. Although, forensic graphology is allowable. Amazingly, 3,000 British businesses use graphologists for recruitment.
- Tangent: Andy once took a handwriting test to try and become a French train driver. He reveals that his friend's dad was a psychologist for SNCF, and they did test to work out if drivers were maniacs or not, so they made people write with their wrong hand, and put a rubber ring around the middle of the pen and you had to try and trace over what was written there. If you drifted up the page, you were either assertive or slightly aggressive, but if it went down the page, you were deemed as too passive. There was also another test where the applicants were told to press the coloured button they were told to press for 15 seconds and there would be a hooter sounded, if they got it wrong. It would also be heard after the 15 seconds, to make sure they didn't go to pieces.
- In Ireland, the police, known as the Garda were duped by a Polish driver called Prawo Jazdy. This driver had done 50 speeding offences across Ireland, and was fast becoming Ireland's most wanted motorist. He managed to make different driving licences with different addresses, so it would be hard to catch him. Then one of the Garda realised that Prawo Jazdy was the Polish for driving licence. Even more weird was the fact that above Prawo Jazdy on the licence was "Permis de conduire", which is of course French. The Queen is the only person in Britain, who can legally drive without a driving licence. The first person to have a driving licence was Karl Benz of Mercedes-Benz. The people who authorised the tests were the Dampfkesselüberwachungsverein ("Steam Boiler Supervision Association"), who authorised the first mandatory licences in Prussia.
- Tangent: Up until 14 May 2002, women in Lithuania were made to undergo smear tests, or to be more accurate, a gynaecological examination. In China, they have a driving test that consists of 100 multiple choice questions. One of them is "If you come across a road accident victim whose intestines are lying on the road, should you pick them up and push them back in?" Yes or No? The answer is No. It was believed that in China that some traffic lights had the colour sequence altered, so red meant go and green meant stop, but they didn't change all the lights, so some still remained at red for stop and green for go, although in some cases, blue is used instead of green, because red-green is a common form of colour blindness.
- Spring travels from Land's End to John o' Groats every year at about ⅓ of a mile per hour, although when going over hills, it takes an extra couple of days per 100 feet of elevation. It officially takes 8 weeks to get from the south of the UK, to the north of the UK. Spring is officially a phenotype of when common plants associated with Spring start to bloom. Birds fly south in the Winter, mainly because they need a source of food.
- The panellists are shown diagrams of perpetual motion machines. A perpetual motion machine never stops, so it carries on forever, but it also must not have any energy input, although it must carry on having energy output. Perpetual motion transgresses both the first and second law of thermodynamics. In an episode of The Simpsons, Lisa makes a perpetual motion machine, although it's impossible for it to happen in reality. Leonardo da Vinci did some drawings of possible perpetual motion machines, but he realised early on that it was going to be impossible for them to work.
- General Ignorance
- If you give a child a really sugary drink, they do not go hyperactive, according to a medical study. The interesting thing about it is that parents actually perceive that sugary drinks make children go hyperactive. A trial on the QI website showed that 0% of people believed this statement.
- If you leave teeth in a glass of cola overnight, nothing much happens (forfeit: they dissolve). In 1951, Clive McCay of Cornell University made an appearance before a select committee at the United States House of Representatives claimed that if a tooth was left in cola, it would start to dissolve after 2 days, but the point is that it's irrelevant, because cola goes down your mouth quickly when you drink it, it doesn't soak into your teeth. Cola does cause tooth decay, but not as much as crisps, as mentioned in a previous episode of QI.
- Tangent: Cola, as well as HP Sauce and vinegar are very good at cleaning coins.
- Tangent: Andy's mum used to tell him not to drink cola, because it stains the inside of your stomach.
- The only ape that walks just on its 2 feet, but isn't a human is the gibbon (forfeits: orangutan; baboon). This way of walking is considered to be more primitive according to evolutionists.
- The panellists are asked to put these 4 things in age order from oldest to youngest: The Himalayas, a triceratops, a spider and a cockroach. The answer is the spider at 300 million years old, then the cockroach, which was just afterwards, then the triceratops which lived between 65 and 230 million years ago and lastly, the Himalayas, which are only 40 million years old. Ants are contemporaneous with dinosaurs, but cockroaches pre-date them by 55 million years.
- QI XL Extras
- Stephen introduced the panellists using Georgian slang. "Gravy-eyed" means runny eyes, "Glimflashy" means an angry person, "Whiddle my scrap" means knowing someone's game or to see what people are up to. This leads to a game of Call My Bluff.
- A "gentleman of three outs" is either a) a person without wit, money or manners, b) a person who owned three outhouses, which would be a mark of status in the 18th century, or c) a genteel description by Punch of the highwayman Jonny Tripplearse. The answer, correctly guessed by Alan was a).
- "Grog Blossom" is either a) the mould inside a barrel of beer that you have to clean out before you can use it again, or b) pimples that were grown on peoples' faces after drinking too much. The answer, incorrectly guessed by Andy & Hugh was b).
- It's believed that 20% of people have difficulty getting up in the morning, because they are either larks or owls. If they were a lark, they'd sleep at dinner parties and if they were an owl, they just can't get up. It's believed that young children and old people are larks, whereas teenagers are owls. There are many other methods of getting up, the MIT invented an alarm clock that when you pressed the Snooze button, it runs away and hides, and it's programmed to go to a different place every day, so it always changes. There is also an alarm clock in the shape of a dumbbell, and it doesn't shut up until you've done 30 reps with it. There is also one that has an online connection, and every time you press Snooze, money is donated to a political cause that you hate.
- Tangent: Phill tells of how he used to sleep listening to BBC World Service, and then waking up listening to BBC Radio 4 and thinking he'd dreamt the news that he heard during his sleep, so thought he was psychic. This leads to Stephen telling a story of how he raided the kitchen at boarding school at 3am, just to get blocks of jelly.
- Tangent: Andy tells the story of a binman who worked near his house at Hernhill, who always sung the last note of Don't Cry for Me Argentina wrongly.
- Tangent: When the American Indians went on dawn raids they used to drink lots of water to make sure they got up early.
- Tangent: Andy has a cuckoo clock, which has a monkey, instead of a cuckoo in it, and it only comes out whenever he says something interesting.
- The Goldilocks effect works on the theory that Goldilocks liked everything "just right". It's used in business, you have 3 items, the first one is unbelievable expensive, the second is a quarter of the price, but just as nice, and the third is very cheap, which makes people go for the second one. The best use of the Goldilocks effect is with airfares. A standard Transatlantic economy seat is £500, business class is £3,500 and first class, where you get a full-size bed and have food whenever you want would cost £8,000. So, people would think that the perks of business class would be reasonable compared to first class, even though it costs 7 times as much as economy.
- Tangent: Alan was once told by Steve Cram that some trainers have to expensively made so people will buy them, an example of "prestige pricing".
- Tangent: The Goldilocks Zone is the distance from the Sun that another planet has to be in another solar system which would support water where it wasn't too hot or cold.
- The snail telegraph was a form of communication. A Frenchman called Benoit had an idea that when 2 snails mated, they had a telepathic power, which meant that no matter how far away they were, they could always make thoughts to each other. So, he raised money and then glued 24 snails in a dish and labelled them all with letters of the alphabet and then he labelled the mates of the snails on another dish and sent it to New York City, so the mate of the one in New York City would wibble to receive the message from the other one in Benoit's lab. Unfortunately, this pasilalinic-sympathetic compass with "escargotic" vibration was proven not to work at all.
Episode 10 "Greats"
- Broadcast date
- 29 January 2010
- 30 January 2010 (XL edition)
- 26 May 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Topics
- Tangent: There does seem to be cases of heightism in the workplace, short people are paid less than taller people and is comparable in magnitude to race and gender. A study of Fortune 500 companies shows 90% of the chief executives of those companies are above average height, and 30% of those are above 6'2".
- Everyone who was born in Europe is descended from the 8th century king Charlemagne. The reason being is that since every person has 2 parents, 4 grandparents, 8 great-grandparents, etc., by the time you get back to the 13th century, you'll have had more ancestors than people who have lived on the planet. This was discovered in 1995, by a man called Mark Humphreys at Dublin University. He discovered that his wife was the great-granddaughter of King Edward III, 20 generations down the line. He also discovered that Hermann Göring and the American explorer Daniel Boone had the same ancestry and then realised that the mathematics meant that everyone had the same ancestry as well.
- The greatest good that the Great Fire of London did was to clear buildings so that new ones could be made by Christopher Wren, such as St Paul's Cathedral (forfeit: cleared the city of plague). By the time of the fire, most of the plague had already gone, but it wouldn't have made much difference to the city, because the plague mainly took hold in the suburbs. By the time of the fire in September 1666, there were very few deaths and it just died, not because of the fire, but by an unknown source.
- The Great Train Robbers weren't really great because of the very easy methods in which they were caught. The went to a farm and played Monopoly using the stolen money and they left their fingerprints all over the set. 12 of the 15 were rounded up, 1 was acquitted and 2 of them were never caught. The most famous member was Ronnie Biggs, who was asked by the mastermind, Bruce Reynolds to find a diesel train driver for the robbery. The man he found was known either as Old Pete or Stan Agate (it's not known because he was one of the 2 who were never caught), and so Biggs received £147,000 (£1.6 million today) just for finding this driver and bringing him to the scene, who it turned out, couldn't drive a train, yet Biggs still received his money.
- Despite being discovered in 1535, the reason it took 300 years to give the Giant tortoise a scientific name was because they were so edible. While they were being brought back to London and eventually Europe, they were all eaten, so no scientific study on them could be done. The only comparisons of them were that they tasted like chicken, beef, mutton and butter and saying how much better they are than all of those things. No-one who had ate tortoise had eaten anything better. All 12 species of giant tortoise are now protected. Adwaita was Clive of India's pet tortoise. He died in 2006, at the age of 255, meaning he was born before Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, before the French Revolution and had his death announced on CNN. He is believed to be the oldest living creature ever, because most creatures don't survive long out of captivity. They were also used as water stores, because they have a special internal bladder that stores water so perfectly that it's drinkable, so when you slit them open you get an extra gallon of fresh water. It was pretty useful, as they could be stacked on boats, because they couldn't move and they didn't need to be fed for a long time. They also contributed to whaling, as they could be used as a foodstuff and a water supply. They had no predators until they were discovered by man, they were evolutionarily complacent, like many island species, because only humans travel across islands in that way.
- General Ignorance
- Catherine the Great died in bed (forfeit: on the loo) after suffering a stroke while on the toilet. People who it is believed did die on the toilet were Elvis Presley and George II, who was declared dead "at stool". It's also not true that Catherine had sexual intercourse with a horse, also she did have plenty of sex with some of her courtiers. Her son, Tsar Paul I hated her and spread the rumour about the sex with horses, as did the French.
- Tangent: Discussion about 18th century paintings depicting horses with small heads.
- In cold weather, most of your heat escapes from your arm or leg (forfeit: your head), if exposed. Only 10% of heat escapes from your head.
- Tangent: Sean tells of how he once sat next to Lionel Blair, and that he never got the chance to tell his grandmother that fact.
- The lingua franca (or everybody's second language) of Ancient Rome was Greek (forfeit: Latin).
- 43 different men have been President of the United States. The panellists are shown a clip from the inauguration of Barack Obama, which shows him saying he's the 44th President, which is true in the case of terms, but not in the terms of people. Grover Cleveland was both the 22nd and 24th President, so he took the Presidential Oath twice. The reason he is counted twice is because he had two non-consecutive terms, since Benjamin Harrison was President between his two terms, so Obama is the 43rd different American president. (Forfeit: 44 — since the forfeit was taken from Obama's speech, Obama himself was given the forfeit of −10 points.)
- QI XL Extras
- The Great Disappointment was the name given to the supposed Second Coming of Jesus. The American William Miller carefully scrutinised the Bible and it suggested that Jesus would return in 1844 and scourge the world and clean the sanctuary, that was according to Daniel 8:4. Over a million Millerites believed him and sold everything they had to prove this belief. One man even threw himself off a barn believing he would be scooped up and saved. Unfortunately, Jesus didn't return and it became known as "The Great Disappointment". Many more well-known religions have branched off from Millerism, including the Seventh-day Adventist Church, which was founded by a former female Millerite, and currently has 15 million adherents in America. Another man, Charles Russell founded the Jehovah's Witnesses, which held the belief of the Apocalypse, as depicted in the Book of Revelations. Nowadays, there is a new movement, known as the Rapture, that believes that when Jesus returns, everyone will escape from their bodies and leave their clothes behind them. A book by Edgar Whisenant that was released in 1988 and called 88 Reasons why the Rapture is in 1988, sold 4 million copies, although it of course, didn't happen, but there is now a website called www.raptureready.com, which has millions of hits, tells of ways to prepare for the Rapture and to protect loved ones who don't make it, such as being stung by enormous wasps. (Forfeit: Have you been talking to my husband? (Jo))
- Tangent: In the Nazi concentration camps, the Jehovah's Witnesses had purple triangles on their uniforms, the Jews had yellow stars, the gays had pink triangles.
- Tangent: As mentioned in Series C, Samuel Pepys famously buried some Parmesan cheese in his garden to protect it from the Great Fire.
- Tangent: Discussion of why cheese has a sell-by date on it.
- Tangent: Sean mixing up the Great Train Robbery with the plot of the film Herbie Rides Again. The Great Train Robbery took place on 8 August 1963 and the amount of money stolen was the equivalent of £40 million in today's money. The train was a post office train that was being sent to burn used £1, £5 and £10 notes.
- Tangent: The main reason why the Great Train Robbery was referred to as "Great", was because it was simply a train robbery. In 1903, the first ever film that was based on a story, rather than just looking at nature was released and it was called The Great Train Robbery.
- Tangent: Alan tells of a café near him that does "good ol' English grub" and on the table there are 3 different menus, one has Sid James and Barbara Windsor in a Carry On film, one has Peter Cook and Dudley Moore in their overcoats and the other has the Kray twins.
- If a Giant Panda does a handstand in front of you, it's trying to tell you that you're on its land. Because they eat for 12 hours a day, they don't have much time for rutting or fighting, so they urinate to mark out their territory, and they prefer to urinate while in the handstand position, and the higher up a tree that the urine lands on, the more dominant it is.
- Tangent: A recent discovery in San Diego Zoo has revealed that pandas don't need Viagra or panda pornography to get sexually excited. It's believed that if they swap cages and smell the secretions in each other's cage, then they're up for it.
Episode 11 "Gifts"
- Broadcast date
- 5 February 2010
- 6 February 2010 (XL edition)
- 1 June 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Topics
- Tangent: Since 1992, there has been a ban on all imports from Cuba to the United States, but most United Nations countries have condemned this boycott, except for Israel and Palau.
- The word for people who don't laugh is agelastic. Examples given were Isaac Newton, who only laughed once in his whole life, Joseph Stalin, who never laughed according to Marshal Zhukov, Jonathan Swift and William Ewart Gladstone. Whereas Anthony Trollope couldn't stop laughing, he actually died giggling. There are theories of laughter: the superiority theory, the sudden glory felt when someone else suffers; the incongruity theory, when the logical dissolves into the absurd, and the relief theory, which was Freud's idea, relieving inhibition to forbidden thoughts and feelings, which leads to Jimmy talking about his book, The Naked Jape, which was about theories like that from around the world. Animals can't laugh.
- Tangent: Jan explains that performing impressions of other people's physical movements and mannerisms is called echopraxia. An impression of the way they speak is called echolalia.
- Tangent: Trollope also invented the post box, but he regretted doing so. The problem was that women were now able to communicate freely at post offices, because before the post box, every woman had to go to their father or servant to put the stamp on, but now they could do send the letters themselves, so could have relationships without their parents' consent.
- The oldest joke in the world was "There was an absent-minded professor who was on a sea voyage when a storm blows up and his slaves are weeping in terror. He said, "Don't cry, I have freed you all in my will"". That joke depicted the Abderites as being rather stupid. The Greek joke book, the Philogelos has this joke inside it: "An Abderite asks a eunuch how many children he has, the eunuch replies "None, Duh! I'm a eunuch!", then the Abderite says..." The punch line of that joke is actually missing. Another old joke is a Sumerian one from 1900BC, which goes "something that has never occurred since time immemorial – a young woman did not fart in her husband's lap." An old English one is "What is the most cleanliest leaf amongst all others? – Holly leaves, because no-one will wipe their arse with them."
- Tangent: The subject of the first impression recorded was Socrates in The Clouds, a play by Aristophanes. Socrates was put to death for corrupting youths.
- Tangent: An old Greek joke provided by Jimmy that still works today, "A barber asks "How do you want your hair cut?", and the person says "In silence"."
- A scold's bridle was a torture device for women who gossip or were malicious and spiteful. A more common punishment is the cucking stool, wrongly known as the ducking stool. The male equivalent was barratry. There are hardly any records of them being used, 50 of them still exist today. The studio has the one that currently resides in Walton-on-Thames.
- "What do you get if you cross a caterpillar and a butterfly?" (Forfeits: butterpillar, caterfly) There is a theory put forward by Donald Williamson called hybridogenesis stating the butterfly and the caterpillar are of different species. Normal starfish start life as a small larva with a tiny starfish inside. They grow and separate and the larva degenerates. Williamson found the Luidia sarsi differs with the larva living for months as an independent animal. He reasons there is a chance of creating a double species, since "sperm and seed" have been mixing in the sea for millions of years, so these new species could be created once every million years.
- 1% of American adults are in jail, roughly 2.3 million, or 1 in every 99.1 adults. More than twice as many as South Africans, more than three times as the Iranians, more than six times as the Chinese. No society in history has imprisoned more of its citizens than the United States. The United Kingdom is ahead of China, Turkey and India, with 148 prisoners per 100,000. In the USA, they have the three strikes law, which gives a life sentence for anyone's third crime, no matter how trivial, providing they have 2 serious crimes against them already. So, a man called Leandro Andrade is serving 2 consecutive 25-year terms for shoplifting 9 videotapes. Another man, Kevin Weber, got given 26 years for stealing 4 chocolate chip cookies. One in 30 men aged between 20–34 are in jail, and for black males, it's 1 in 9. There are more 17-year-old black people in jail, than in college. 5% of the world is American, and 25% of all prisoners are American.
- Tangent: In reference to the first question, you're not allowed to bring in anything into America that has been made in a prison, but the prisoners are effectively slave labour. 100% of all military helmets, ammunition belts, bulletproof vests and ID tags and other military essentials are made in jail, along with 93% of domestically produced paints, 36% of home appliances and 21% of office furniture, which allows the USA to compete with Mexico. All prisoners are forced to work, failure to comply leads to solitary confinement.
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: Baring-Gould is also believed to have been at a children's party he asked a small girl, "And whose little girl are you?" whereon she burst into tears, and said: "I'm yours, Daddy." He did however have 15 children, so could have been easily confused. Alan tells how a comedian was asked after an act who his agent was, and the comedian replied "You are".
- Tangent: Art collector Edward James recalled in his autobiography, his mother shouting "Nanny! I'm going to church. I want one of my daughters to go with me." The nanny then asked which one. Mrs. James replied "The one with the red hair, she'll go with this coat."
- It is virtually impossible for Archimedes to have moved the Earth in the way he suggested (forfeit: with a lever). He said, "Give me a place to stand and I will move the Earth." Assuming he weighed 100 kilograms and placed his fulcrum a kilometre away from the bottom of the Earth, he would need a lever 6.5 billion light-years long to balance and move the planet. Assuming that he moved the lever by one metre, the Earth would move by less than the diameter of a single proton.
- Tangent: If you tried to use Newtonian mechanics, by getting everyone to jump up at the same time, the Earth would a tiny bit, but it would be cancelled out by Newton's third law of motion.
- QI XL Extras
- Tangent: Despite the United States-Cuba boycott, you can still get flights to Miami, and people on the flights wear massive coats to hide things that they're not allowed to bring on board from security.
- Tangent: In recent times, the Academy Awards goody bag have had to be declared against tax. The 2008 Academy Awards goody bags were worth £57,000. They included a £15,000 holiday, an espresso machine, a cashmere blanket worth £855 and a white gold pearl and diamond pendant worth £740. At the BAFTAs, you get given Tic Tacs and at the British Comedy Awards, they used to give out bowls of Minstrels, as well as plenty of alcohol.
- The box of chocolates given by Gordon Brown to George W. Bush were immediately destroyed. Under the guidelines of the United States Secret Service, any food or drink is immediately destroyed, such as the £150 box of Charbonnel et Walker given by Brown to Bush. The Prime Minister of Qatar gave him a £650 box of chocolates, the President of Iraq gave him an assortment of nut pasties and 3 lb of live shamrocks from Bertie Ahern given to celebrate Saint Patrick's Day were all destroyed. The QI office rang Downing Street to ask if they were aware of this, they didn't reply. Brown gave Barack Obama an inedible ornamental penholder made from the Victorian anti-slaver HMS Gannet. In return, Brown was given 25 American classic DVDs, not including, as Jimmy hoped, Who's Nailin' Paylin? Some believe that the discs were actually Region 1, which meant that Brown couldn't watch them unless he had a hacked DVD player. It's believed that the only reason these pointless presents are given out is because of protocol.
- The world's cheapest cheapskate is the dance fly, which give gifts in the form of silk or a balloon wrapped in the male's anal secretions. One of the species, the Rhamphomyia sulcata, which captures an insect, sucks out its innards completely and then wraps the empty shell and gives it to the female, but by the time that the female unwraps it, he's mated her, then scarpered. In the insect kingdom, some male insects pretend to be females, so they can receive a gift from a male and just have it for another female.
- Tangent: Jan tells of the story about one of the first cheapskates, Diogenes the Cynic.
- Tangent: It was almost impossible to do an impression of Gladstone or Disraeli in the 19th century, as the population was so big, it would be hard to know if the impression was accurate at all. Harold Macmillan met Peter Cook at the Fortune Theatre, and Cook impersonated Macmillan, the first time a Prime Minister had been impersonated. In 1737, Robert Walpole created an act which forbade any person from doing political satire on him, it also gave the Lord Chamberlain the powers to approve any play before it was staged, with the exception of The Establishment Club.
- Luigi Galvani from Bologna discovered that electricity works through frogs, hence creating the term galvanization, which meant that humans worked with electricity. His Giovanni Aldinistar pupil toured England in 1803 and astounded the Royal College of Surgeons with what he discovered. He convulsed the body of the murderer George Forster, just after he'd been hanged. Electric rods were attached to Foster's mouth and ear, which led to the jaw quivering and one eye opening, then when a rod was placed up his rectum, the whole body convulsed, so it looked like reanimation. The experiment proved that the nerves use electricity to make the body work, rather than pneumatic power as previously thought. Mary Shelley saw this to prove that electricity created life, but oddly, in her book Frankenstein, electricity isn't used, only in all the film representations of Frankenstein is it used. Galvanized buckets are coated with zinc to avoid corrosion, it has nothing to do with this form of galvanization.
- The Emperor of China hated pigeons because they used to steal the rice from his rice granaries. Enemies of the Emperor would train pigeons to fly to the granaries and tell them to steal as much of the rice as they can and fly back, then they would be fed water and alum to disgorge the rice, which could then be washed. They could get 50 lbs of rice from 100 pigeons. It's unknown if they were ever caught.
- Tangent: Clive once got given some homing pigeons, which returned to their original owners after a couple of weeks.
Episode 12 "Gravity"
- Broadcast date
- 12 February 2010
- 13 February 2010 (XL edition)
- 8 June 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Note: This is the first time Alan has been a joint winner, and also the first time that Rich Hall has sat in a different seat to his usual one (on Stephen's immediate left). Up until now, only Alan has sat in the same seat, apart from when he swapped places with Stephen in the series B Christmas Special.
- Buzzers
- Rich — Falling object crashing on landing
- Barry — Soldiers marching followed by their commander shouting "Wait for it!"
- Bill — A speak-your-weight machine saying "12 stone, 2 pounds, 4 ounces"
- Alan — A person being sprung in the air yelling "Arrrrrrrggggghhhhh!!!"
- Topics
- Theoretically, you can get to anywhere on Earth in exactly 42 minutes and 12 seconds, by burrowing through it. The speed would be the maximum velocity as determined by gravity. If you had a tube that went through the Earth, you'd accelerate to the middle, then decelerate on your way out. You could end up anywhere, because gravity works at every angle, not just north-south. The Antipodes are the exact opposite points on Earth, they don't have to be north-south. There was a contest to make an Earth Sandwich to find the antipodal points of places on the Earth. The winners had New Zealand at one end and Spain at the other, but there was controversy because baguettes were used for the sandwich, and if they were put crossways, it strictly wouldn't be a sandwich. Other antipodal points include Indonesia to Colombia, and an interesting one for religionists, Mecca to the Tematangi Atoll (also known as Captain Bligh's Atoll) in the Pacific Ocean. There is a massive lagoon in the centre of the island, and because it's the antipode, whichever direction you look at, you're facing Mecca. The 42 minutes and 12 second theory was made in a series of letters in the 17th century between Isaac Newton and Robert Hooke.
- Tangent: The idea of a gravity train isn't feasible on Earth, but it's possible on the Moon, because there is no molten core, but it would take 53 minutes to go through the Moon.
- Aristotle believed that heavier objects fell faster than lighter objects, but this theory was disproved by Galileo Galilei who worked out in his head that objects with different masses fell at the same speed. He then did experiments involving ramps and other things (forfeit: dropping cannonballs from the Leaning Tower of Pisa). He then proved that half a ton of coal fell at the same speed as a ton of coal. He also proved that if people believed Aristotle's theory, it wouldn't work, since he said that the heavier object fell faster than the lighter one, so if they were attached together they would have to fall at the same speed, because one couldn't hold the other one up. Then, the Apollo 15 astronaut David Scott did an experiment on the Moon with a hammer and a feather to prove Galileo right.
- Tangent: Alan tried to answer which was heavier, a ton of gold or a ton of feathers, but since gold is measured in troy weight, rather than avoirdupois, a ton of gold is heavier than a ton of feathers.
- Tangent: Similarly, Isaac Newton's law of gravitation were thought out before he published them in 1687, which was a whole 100 years before the Montgolfier brothers did their first flight in a hot air balloon.
- George Biggin and Letitia Sage flew in a hydrogen balloon from Southwark and went "all the way". Around 150,000 people came to see balloon ascents, as they were the spectacle of the age. Vincenzo Lunardi, an Italian who brought ballooning to Britain, was going to go up with Biggin & Sage, but he then thought that might be too many, so he escaped and so they became the first members of the mile high club. Whilst flying over Piccadilly, it was believed that Sage was spotted "on all fours", although she later claimed that she was fastening up the opening of the balloon. The accurate answer is that they got to Harrow, so they travelled a distance of 14 miles, and spoke to below through a speaking trumpet. There was a scandal involving wager books and the gentlemen's clubs, Brooks's and White's in the St James's area of London. It mainly involved making bets involving having sexual intercourse in a balloon, or as they put it, "plays hospitals with...", but they made bets on just about anything imaginable.
- Tangent: The first people to cross the English Channel by air were Jean-Pierre Blanchard and his American backer. While on the flight, they had a massive argument involving their nations, who they were both very proud of. So, Blanchard put on lead weights to give the balloon more ballast, meaning that Jeffries would have to get out, so Blanchard would become the first man to cross, but then both their national flags fell out of the balloon as well. Then they dropped out of the sky too early, so they had to jettison all their food and instruments, as well as the sandbags, before taking all their clothing off and they then peed and pooed out of the basket, and they just made it over the cliffs and landed in a tree to get the record.
- A gossypiboma is something left inside you by a surgeon after he has done an operation, normally cotton, lint or sponge. "Gossypi" is actually the Latin for cotton. There are 1,500 cases of this every year in the United States. 54% of foreign objects are found in the abdomen or pelvis, 22% in the vagina, 7.5% in the chest and 17% in other places, like the spinal canal, brain or face. There have been cases of suing, such as a man who had a 6 inch metal surgical clamp, but then they realised that he'd already had an operation to take out a 6 inch surgical clamp, because it was then found out that he had 2 stuck in, and when they removed the first one, they didn't bother checking around for the other one. The main reason for objects being left in people is either because of emergency work which hasn't been properly planned, unplanned changes in procedure and patients with a higher body mass index. If the item stuck inside a person is a surgical instrument, it's known as foreign-body granuloma, but interesting the surgeons refer to it as "retaining", making out that it's the fault of the patients. (Forfeit: mind your own business (Barry - after being asked "What do you say to a gossypiboma?"))
- When you shoot a gun in the air, the bullets land in a different place, so the shooter would never get hit, as even a small blast of wind, would move it away from the gun. A test was done on a floating platform, where 500 bullets were shot in the air and only 4 landed on the platform. A typical 7.62mm bullet fired vertically can reach a height of nearly 2.5km, meaning it would take 17 seconds to reach the top height, then take another 40 seconds to come down, if it was going at a speed of 70 metres a second, which would cause serious cranial injuries. If you had a bullet in one hand and a gun facing horizontally at the same level in another, both bullets would hit the ground at the same time, if fired at the same time. The reason being is that they both have the same force working on them, gravity. The only way this couldn't happen is if the bullet was fired at 5 miles per second, which means it would leave the Earth and never return into the atmosphere, or if the bullet went far enough, because then the curvature of the Earth would mean it had further to fall. There are many practical applications to this in the laws of physics which say it must be the case.
- If someone is hiding at the Welcome Break motorway service station at Scratchwood Services, which is the first service station on the M1 motorway, north of London, the best way to stop them without getting out of London and with no telecommunications, is to shoot them using the guns on HMS Belfast, which is permanently moored in the River Thames in the centre of London. The forward turrets on HMS Belfast are directly aimed at Scratchwood Services.
- Tangent: In World War II, the USS Phoenix managed to survive the attack on Pearl Harbor without even a scratch, it was known as the luckiest ship in the United States Navy. It was sunk in 1982, after it had been sold to Argentina and renamed General Belgrano, which still remains the only ship sunk by a nuclear submarine, with the loss of over 300 lives.
- General Ignorance
- The daily recommendation of wine could be dispensed by a cloud the size of a bus. The daily limit of wine is 250ml.
- A gunslinger's revolver has 5 bullets (forfeit: six). Wyatt Earp said that despite the fact there are six chambers, the 6th chamber is for safety, the hammer can rest on it, so you couldn't discharge by mistake, because the six-gun, as it was known, had no safety catch.
- Tangent: Stephen met an armourer in America who worked on Westerns all his life and said that the only 2 people never to blink when firing a gun were Clint Eastwood and Yul Brynner. Alan Davies abruptly said one of them was Kenneth Williams.
- The red juice that comes out of a steak when you cook it is myoglobin (forfeit: blood), which is used to operate muscles. When you use muscles for short, sharp bursts of energy, glucose from the blood provides the fuel, but when you want to do sustained activity, myoglobin is used to oxidise the fat, which provides the energy.
- Tangent: A joke from Stephen: "What do you get when you put "it" in gravy?" – Gravity.
- QI XL Extras
- Tangent: A discussion about the film Brazil, change machines, tubes, the dangers of aeroplane toilets and sucking up prairie dogs with a grain elevator.
- Tangent: In those days, they used a barometer as an altimeter when flying.
- An underwater weighing machine would be used for the most accurate form of body weighing (Forfeit: whale weigh station). If you're under 20% fat, then you're not obese, but for women, it's 30%.
- Tangent: The body mass index is your weight divided by your height squared. Although the BMI has flaws, because muscular people would be classed as overweight, because of all their toned muscles, but marathon runners would also be classified as malnourished and underweight.
- Even though bicycles have been around for over a century, the physics of bicycles has been poorly understood. When you want to turn left on a bicycle, you turn the handlebar slightly to the right, known as countersteering.
- Tangent: Bill reveals the time that he played Adolf Hitler in a play called "The Resistible Rise of Arturo Ui", and his mum said that Bill looked great looking like Hitler.
- Tangent: Stephen tells of a Utopian way of exchanging bicycles that happened in Cambridge, where people would just exchange bikes wherever they wanted and it lasted just 2 days.
- The Fosbury Flop was created by Dick Fosbury as a better technique to do the high jump. The previous techniques were the straddle, the Western roll, the Scissors and the Eastern cut-off. In the 1968 Summer Olympics, he performed this new technique and won the gold medal. The reason why every high jumper now uses the Fosbury Flop is because of how the centre of gravity works. When doing the Flop, your centre of gravity is under the bar, whereas if you did the Scissors, your centre of gravity would be 30cm over the bar. The other thing the Flop did was change the landing from a sandpit to a cushion type landing. So, by having a lower centre of gravity, you have more height, in exchange for no extra effort. The records have also stood for a long time. The male record was set in 1993, while the female one was set in 1987. The male long jump record between 1935 and 1960 was held by Jesse Owens.
- Tangent: Bill tells of the time he lost a charity limbo dancing match to Sinitta and Lionel Blair. He came 3rd, and Lionel Blair won.
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: The recommended daily allowance of wine in the United Kingdom is 21 units per week. In Poland, it's 12.5, in Canada, it's 23.75 and in America, it's 24.5, in South Africa and Denmark, it's 31.5 and in Australia, it's 35. In the UK, if you drank between 21 and 30 units, you'd be in the group of people in the lowest mortality rate in the country. To be on the same level as a teetotaller, you'd have to drink 63 units a week, the equivalent of a whole bottle of wine a day. Although, it was later admitted by the person who made the claim, that he made the number up, and was just asked to think of a number.
Episode 13 "Gothic"
- Broadcast date
- 19 February 2010
- 20 February 2010 (XL edition)
- 15 June 2010 (ABC1 airing/iView upload)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Alan Davies (joint winner with −17 points) 12th win; the second time Alan has won consecutive shows
- Jimmy Carr (−28 points) 15th appearance
- Jack Dee (joint winner with −17 points) 2nd appearance, 1st win
- Sue Perkins (−26 points) 1st appearance
- Buzzers
- Jack — Psycho-esque music
- Jimmy — A man breaking down a door, saying "Here's Jimmy!", followed by a woman screaming (a reference to The Shining)
- Sue — The Wilhelm scream
- Alan — The reading of a classified football result; "Arsenal 0, Norwich City 4." (Famously, Davies is an Arsenal fan, while Fry is a Norwich fan.)
- Theme
- Topics
- The panellists are shown a picture of a grotesque (forfeit: gargoyle). The difference between a grotesque and a gargoyle is that gargoyles are used for draining and guttering in Gothic buildings. The word gargoyle comes from the French gargouille, meaning throat, also coming from the English word "gargle".
- The Goths were originally from Scandinavia, who defeated the Vandals, a German tribe, where we get the word "vandal" from. Goth has tended to mean other things though, such as the cathedrals, which were called "barbaric" during the Italian Renaissance, as it was used as an insult for anything that wasn't classic, because they were perceived to be the people who destroyed Rome and therefore civilisation. Gothic literature has tended to be referred to as "macabre". Carpenter Gothic is a form of craftsmanship famously depicted in the Grant Wood painting American Gothic, which showed a house, now known as the American Gothic House in the town of Eldon, Iowa. The main feature of Carpenter Gothic is the pointed Ecclesiastical star on the top, which resembles a Gothic arch. If a Goth is "emotional", they're referred to as Emos. Emos want to kill themselves, whereas Goths want to kill everyone else.
- Tangent: The man in American Gothic was Grant Wood's dentist.
- Tangent: Discussion about why everyone wanted to paint their bedrooms black, like Goths.
- Tangent: Jimmy points out how the woman in American Gothic looks like Gail Platt from Coronation Street.
- The painter who painted Sunflowers was Vincent van Gogh, pronounced faŋ ˈxɔx (forfeits: Van Goff; Van Goth; Van Go). The Dutch pronunciation was given by Arthur Japin, a famous novelist, who is also the presenter of the Dutch version of QI, who was also in the audience. Stephen and Arthur talk about the Dutch version, as well as Thomas van Luyn, who is the Dutch equivalent to Alan in the show.
- Tangent: Discussion about van Gogh giving his ear to a prostitute, and the "possibility" of it being a primitive bugging device, which leads to Alan telling of the similarity between that and the alien in the John Sayles film The Brother from Another Planet.
- The whole planet's population of 6.8 billion could turn into zombies, otherwise known as a zombie apocalypse, within 38 days, using geometric progression and exponential growth to work it out. The word "zombie" comes from Haiti, where they got the venom from a pufferfish to make them appear sort of "dead". It was first discovered by Wade Davis, an ethnobotanist in the 1980s, but his theory that it put people into a sort of "zombie trance" isn't universally accepted.
- In Accra, the capital city of Ghana, people are buried in elaborate coffins made into whatever shape you wanted, like a fish, an aeroplane, a mobile phone, a Bible or even a car. They cost up to US$400, which is nearly a year's wages to some Ghanaians. It's only been a tradition in Ghana for the last 50 years or so.
- The best way to make sure your family never forget you after you die is to make a lifesize replica of yourself. The Japanese artist Hananuma Masakichi was diagnosed with tuberculosis in the 1880s, so he knew he was going to die, so he made a life-size replica of himself that matched him exactly, with every hair from every pore on his body included, as well as his fingernails, toenails, teeth and having glass eyes made in place of real ones. It was so life-like, that people couldn't tell which was the real one and which was the fake. It eventually went into Robert Ripley's Odditorium in Los Angeles, but it got injured in an earthquake in 1996, and is awaiting restoration.
- Tangent: In Seattle, there is a company called SeeMeRot.com, where you can have cameras put into coffins, so you can the person inside disintegrate (This is most likely a hoax).[2] Their slogan is "Being dead and buried doesn't mean you can't have friends over!". This leads to a discussion about being buried alive.
- In the 1960s, ⅔ of all Americans who accidentally lost a limb came from the same town in Florida. The reason was insurance. There were 50 occurrences in the town which had a population of just 500. Most claimed they were shot off by hunting rifles. Other claims included accidentally firing someone climbing a fence.
- General Ignorance
- When a heartbeat monitor flatlines, it means you have tripped on a cable and pulled it out. (Forfeit: You're dead)
- After the Vietnam War, the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier was occupied by a soldier who had died in Vietnam (forfeit: nobody knows). His family had heard that "the Unknown Soldier" had died in a helicopter crash, and their son had also died in the same helicopter crash, but through DNA testing, it was proved that he was "the Unknown Soldier", so his remains were exhumed. It's believed that there never will be another "Unknown Soldier", because all British & American soldiers are DNA profiled. The original "Unknown Soldier" was first done simultaneously in Britain & France after World War I in 1920. In Britain, there were 4 bodies and the general pointed at one and he became "the Unknown Soldier". That particular soldier was given a state funeral at Westminster Abbey with full military honours and was entombed with a Medieval crusader's sword from the Royal Collection in the presence of a guard made up of 100 VC's. The guests of honour were 100 women who had lost their husbands and their sons during the war. The Cenotaph, made by Lutyens is dedicated to the soldier as well.
- The phrase "Saved by the bell" is a boxing term. There is no proof of the myths about people who tied a bell to their toe, but they have found to not be true, although many people do fear premature burials, such as in the Edgar Allan Poe book, The Premature Burial. (Forfeit: buried alive)
- Mozart's burial wasn't a pauper's funeral in Vienna as many believe, although only members of the aristocracy were buried in tombs or vaults. His funeral cost 8 guilder and 56 kreuzer. Mozart had a pet starling whom he buried in 1784, and its whistling inspired the principal theme of the last movement of Piano Concerto K453.
- Tangent: On the top 10 list of play-off tunes for people who die is the theme tune to Countdown.
- QI XL Extras
- Tangent: Discussion about The Da Vinci Code being a book about "bad monks" and about the fact that Grant Wood sounds like the name of a porn star.
- Tangent: Discussion about early Goths, such as Alice Cooper, Robert Smith of The Cure and Siouxsie Sioux.
- Tangent: Discussion of the new theory that van Gogh lost his ear in a fight with Paul Gauguin. van Gogh was never good with girls either, the parents of a girl he liked refused him access, so he stood with his hand being burnt by a flame of a candle until he could see her, but her father just blew it out and told him to go away.
- Tangent: The exponential growth originated with the rice and chessboard problem, in which a guy puts one piece of rice on the first chessboard piece, then 2 on the next, 4 on the next, etc. The total number of grains needed to fill the board is 18,446,744,073,709,551,615 (2^64 – 1), which is the amount of rice that would be made in 80 years, if all the arable land was converted.
- Tangent: Even though zombies and voodoo are associated with Haiti, it originated in West Africa. "Zombie" comes from the West African word, "nzambi".
- Tangent: Jimmy once took his brother through a graveyard and he thought that people who were buried under gravestones with curly bits on the top were chefs.
- In a graveyard, a person buried under a broken column means that they died young. Other symbols include a broken chain which symbolises a loss in the family and apples represent sin. The lichen that grows on graveyards is looked at by scientists as an indicator for pollution. The main reasons they do it is because you can roughly tell the age of the lichen on the gravestone because of the date and graveyards are not normally sprayed with chemicals, so they remain unaltered, and because it's considered bad to spray them with pesticides.
- Tangent: Other odd methods of burials include being turned into compost by being dissolved in liquid nitrogen then being vibrated, then a magnet is used to remove mercury and other metals that could harm the making of it. Then 25–30 kilograms are left over which then gets made into a coffin made out of maize or potato starch, and then you're buried and rot into the earth and biodegrade within 6–12 months.
- The Vampire Squid from Hell, Latin name, Vampyroteuthis infernalis, has the biggest eyes of any animal in comparison to the size of its head, if it were put into a human, the eyes of a human would be a foot wide. Because it lives so deep in the sea, its defence is not ink, but a stream of blue bioluminescent orbs, which dazzle its enemies.
- The toughest way to become a mummy is by self-mummification. In the old days, they used to remove the brain through the nose by turning it into a liquid mush. A Buddhist sect called Sokushinbutsu use self-mummification. To do this, for 1,000 days, a priest would eat nuts and seeds, while taking part in vigorous physical activity, so he'd have no body fat. Then for another 1,000 days, he's eat just bark and tree roots and then drink a poisonous tea made from the sap of the Urushi tree, which would cause him to vomit and lose bodily fluids. Then he'd be locked inside a small stone tomb with just an air tube and a bell while doing the lotus position. He'd ring the bell every day to prove he was alive. When the bell stopped ringing, the tube was removed and the tomb was sealed. Then after another 1,000 days, the tomb was checked and if it was successful, he was deemed to have reached enlightenment. Since the 19th century, it's not done any more, as it is now an illegal form of suicide.
- Tangent: The panellists try to explain to Stephen what the reverse cowgirl is.
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: Another popular play-off tune is Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen. The next track on their album after Bohemian Rhapsody is Another One Bites the Dust.
Episode 14 "Greeks"
- Broadcast date
- 5 March 2010
- 6 March 2010 (XL edition)
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Buzzers
- Notes
- This is the third instance of a complete panel appearing twice. Anderson, Hall and Jupitus all appeared together in episode 3 of series B.
- The Audience were only announced as winners in the XL version, as the fact that won them their 10 points was cut from the initial broadcast.
- Theme
- Topics
- Rich Athenians had to sponsor a Greek battleship (if your property was worth 70 times more than the average wage of a skilled worker). The only way to get out of it was by finding someone richer.
- According to Herodotus, before a Spartan went into battle they had a new haircut, which meant that they were preparing for mortal combat.
- Tangent: At The Battle of Thermopylae, the 300 Spartans were accompanied by 700 Thespians.
- Tangent: The word "laconic" means taking your time before you answer.
- The word gymnasium comes from the Greek word "Gymnos", meaning naked, hence "gymnasium" meant "a naked place". During the Ancient Olympic Games, the competitors performed naked and used a pouch called a kynodesme to keep their penis in.
- Tangent: Other things involving the word "gymnos", were "gymnopaedia", where young naked boys went out dancing in public festivals and "gymnologise" means "to debate while naked".
- Baron de Coubertin, the founder of the modern Olympic Games, won his own Olympic gold medal in poetry. There were all kinds of artistic events but they were stopped as it was felt it defeated the point of amateurism.[3]
- Tangent: Up until the 1948 games there was a medal for town planning.
- Tangent: The oldest person to win an Olympic medal was a Briton called John Copley, who won a silver medal in the 1948 engravings and etchings event, aged 73.
- Olympic gold medals are made of at least 92.5% silver (forfeits: gold, chocolate). They are gold plated and they do have six grams of gold in them, but they haven't been made entirely of gold since 1912.
- Tangent: If the medals today were made out of 18 carat gold, they'd be worth £3,000, or £1.5 million for the whole competition.
- If you bite a gold coin and a toothmark is left, then it's a fake coin, because other metals were used in making gold coins but for counterfeits lead was used, and that did leave an impression.
- Tangent: There is no lead in pencils, as mentioned in series A.
- Tangent: Only 161,000 tonnes of gold has ever been mined in human history, most of it being in the last 50 years
- Tangent: The island of Yap in Micronesia, used hole shaped stones as its currency, and it makes it a fixed money supply.
- Sewage could be used to create alien life, because most faeces produced in space is jettisoned rather than taken back to Earth. Arthur C. Clarke had a theory known as "Toilet of the Gods", which suggested that humans might even be descended from the poo of another civilisation. A lot of the junk in Earth's orbit was found to be covered in faecal matter
- Tangent: There are now space debris lawyers to ensure any junk that hits an Earth-orbiting satellite.
- General Ignorance
- Meteorites that have just crashed on Earth would be too cold (forfeit: it's hot).
- Tangent: In space meteor temperatures are between −240°C and −270°C, inside and outside.
- Tangent: Around 50,000 meteorites above 20 grams fall into Earth every year, most of them are lost at sea and most of the rest are found in Antarctica.
- Tangent: No human has ever died from a meteorite, a dog was killed by one in Egypt in 1911 and a boy from Uganda was hit, but not seriously hurt by one in 1992.
- The instant you get sucked into a vacuum you have only the amount of air left that you exhale to survive (forfeit: instant death). You could survive with no long-term problems, but only if you stay in for only a couple of minutes. Gases escaping from your body would make you instantly defecate, projectile vomit and urinate.
- The country that has weekly news broadcasts in Latin is Finland (forfeit: Vatican City). The show, called Nuntii Latini has a 5-minute broadcast every Friday at 1:55pm, then again on the local radio in Helsinki. Radio Bremen in Germany also do four and a half minutes of Latin news a month.
- Tangent: More people outside Finland understand Latin than Finnish.
- Tangent: There is a Finnish singer called Jukka Ammondt who has done covers of Elvis Presley songs in Latin.
- Because of health and safety, plates are not thrown at the end of a Greek meal any more. Instead, flowers are now used as they're safer (forfeit: plates). Greek restaurants can obtain a licence to throw plates.
- QI XL Extras
- Tangent: The suffix "ship", as in "battleship" or "championship" is of Germanic origin. All the f's in German become p's and the Arabic language removed all its p's. This is known as the fricative shift.
- A Roman orgy is not as debauched as a Greek symposium. A Greek symposium was a place mainly for drinking, as opposed as to what it means today. A Roman orgy wasn't really a place where mass sexual intercourse took place.
- Tangent: Caligula liked to have solid gold food and fish that were blue.
- Tangent: A vomitorium was not a place used to throw up food, but was actually an exit from a theatre.
- Tangent: tactical chundering.
- Tangent: Gymnasiums were originally designed to be places where the middle classes trained for battle. They then became places of education, the two most famous ones being the Academy and the Lyceum. The Academy was where Plato taught and was named after Akademos.
- Tangent: The word Odeon as used to describe a movie theatre was named by Oscar Deutsch, who used his initials "OD", to name the cinema chain he created.
- Tangent: David O'Keefe created counterfeit Rai stones on Yap and ruined its economy.
- A 'Greek ideal' was a person who seemed to symbolise the "perfect" Greek person, determined by a few factors, one of them being the wrist measurement. Each of the panellists gave their wrist measurement and the one closest to the Greek ideal was Clive.
- Tangent: Eugen Sandow and Monsieur Attila created the bodybuilding craze, later made more famous by Charles Atlas and Arnold Schwarzenegger. They made their fame by doing shows in London, and their fans were only allowed to touch them with smelling salts nearby in case they fainted.
- Tangent: Phill has a tattoo of a Greek helmet on his wrist (actually the logo for Trojan Records).
-
- This theory was created by Kurt Gödel, widely regarded as the best logician in the 20th century. He never published it because he thought it would make people think he believed in God and he was just demonstrating how symbolic logic could be used. He was also a personal friend of Albert Einstein. Gödel starved himself to death because he kept having paranoid fantasies of being poisoned.
- Tangent: Stephen was in the film I.Q., where Lou Jacobi played Gödel and Walter Matthau played Einstein. Matthau taught Stephen how to gamble.
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: When Greece won UEFA Euro 2004, a pub near where Alan lived made a homemade blue plaque, which said that a Greek person ran naked down the New North Road to celebrate Greece's victory.
- Bonus: Because Alan was in last place, Stephen gave him the chance to switch his points with that of the audience (in a reference to the first question), if he could say what the audience got their points for.
Episode 15 "Green"
- Broadcast date
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Notes
- The projection screen behind Alan and Bill broke during recording, so moved to the other side of the studio for the rest of the show (and was later re-filmed for broadcast).
- Buzzers
- The buzzers were disconnected and the contestants had a selection of small wind instruments
- Bill – Plays a scale on a swanee whistle
- Danny – Imitates a cuckoo call
- Jeremy – Blows hard, causing it to emit a piercing, high-pitched sound
- Alan – A duck call
- Topics
- Tangent: In the book, the monster is called Adam.
- A tonne of mobile phones contains 150 grams of gold whereas every ton of ore mined is only 5 grams of gold
- Tangent: 1.5 million mobile phones are thrown away in the UK every year.
- Tangent: All the gold ever mined in human history would form a cube 55 feet (17 m) square.
- Tangent: A discussion of the 24-hour clock.
- Tangent: The Babylonians devised a 12-hour clock, because they had a base-12 counting system.
- Tangent: Jeremy talks about reaching the Magnetic North Pole.
- The word vegetarian comes from the Latin word "vegetus", meaning "whole", "sound", "fresh" or "lively" (Forfeit: they only eat vegetables).
- Tangent: Adolf Hitler was not a vegetarian.
- Tangent: Bill talks of his tortoise's leg amputation.
- A cow magnet collects stray metal objects that the animal has swallowed, allowing them to be digested.
- Tangent: Attacks on people by cows.
- General Ignorance
- Tangent: Female mosquitoes are attracted by moisture, lactic acid, carbon dioxide, body heat and movement.
- Tangent: Sugar-based Cocktails
- Wind turbines kill bats because the change of pressure damages their lungs if they fly too close (forfeit) kill birds.
Episode 16 "Geometry"
- Broadcast date
- Recording date
- Panellists
- Notes
- This is the first regular edition of QI to not have the klaxon forfeit being set off.
- Buzzers
- Topics
- People who wear striped clothing look slimmer if the stripes are horizontal, not vertical, as many people think. It was even said that a female prisoner asked to have vertical stripes on her uniform to make her look slimmer. It was discovered after research by Dr. Peter Thompson of the University of York.
- Tangent: David's rant about people going on about wearing striped clothing.
- The columns around the Parthenon look straight because they are actually straight. It was originally believed to be an optical illusion due to a thing called entasis, which is where if a column is exactly straight, it looks big from a distance, but it looks spindly if it bows inwards. So, if you make it bow outwards, it looks straight. But, that's what they didn't do. It is also believed that entasis is used on some buildings nowadays to give them more support, but it certainly doesn't exist in the Parthenon.
- Tangent: Johnny's rant at Stephen giving ridiculously easy questions.
- Tangent: This research was also done by Dr. Peter Thompson, who happens to be in the audience at this recording, and "upsets" Johnny by saying that despite the fact that Johnny is wearing horizontal stripes, he doesn't look too thin.
- The panellists are shown 2 shapes; a splodgy shape and a spiky shape. One is called "kiki" and the other is called "bouba". Neither of the shapes are associated with the names, but the psychologist Wolfgang Köhler devised this test to see what people who spoke different languages thought when they heard the words "kiki" and "bouba", and everyone said that "kiki" sounded like the spiky one and "bouba" sounded like the splodgy one, a sort of onomatopoeia, as it were.
- Tangent: In the Huambisa language of South America, 98% of people who didn't speak it, when hearing the words "chunchuikit" and "mauts", and asked which was a bird, and which was a fish, thought that "chunchuikit" was a bird and "mauts" was a fish.
- Tangent: Rob claims that the Welsh for carrot is "moron" (which, in fact, it is), which he thinks is wrong, but then Stephen informs him that "moron" comes from the Greek for "blunt", hence "oxymoron" means "sharp blunt".
- The most successful textbook of all time is Euclid's Elements. Euclid's teachings in the book are mostly about planes and conic sections and all the forms of circles and squares, which basically showed how geometry works, which came in very handy for physics and engineering. Many mathematicians believe it to be the most beautiful of all mathematics textbooks. John Dee, the court magician to Queen Elizabeth I, was responsible for bringing Euclid to the attention of the world. He was also a spy and used 007 as a cipher. Alan got 7 points for knowing that piece of information.
- The best place to go to look into the future is on the International Date Line. If you're to the left of the line, you're ahead in time compared to when you're on the right of the line. Stephen lost a day when he flew from Los Angeles to Sydney recently. David then claims that if you did that every day, you'd theoretically live twice as long as everyone else, because the trip lasted one day, but in terms of actual time, it took 2 days. The literal best place to go is the Diomede Islands in the Bering Strait. Big Diomede Island is on the left of the line and Little Diomede Island is to the right of the line, so if you look at Big Diomede from Little Diomede, you are looking into the future.
- Tangent: The main reason why the International Date Line is squiggly and the Greenwich Meridian is straight, is because that the Date Line tries not to got through land, so it goes round island territories.
- The panellists are shown this puzzle and are asked where the missing square is. The answer is that the missing piece was created because the hypotenuse of the triangles are curved, not straight. The small triangle has a ratio of 5:2 and the big triangle has a ratio of 8:3, so neither triangle is similar. One has a slightly dipped line, the other has a slightly "up" line. The eye assumes they're straight, but they aren't. It's known as Curry's paradox.
- General Ignorance
- The best place to punch a shark is in the eye or the gill, not the nose, as many people think, although it is true of dogs though. More people in the world are bitten by New Yorkers than by sharks. 81% of people who are bitten by sharks suffered minor injuries, although people bitten by humans could get rabies or other diseases. As mentioned in QI's A series, more people are killed by toilets than by sharks every year. 120 million sharks are killed by humans every year, mainly just for their fins, so shark fin soup can be produced, which according to Stephen is very tasteless, and chicken stock is used to give it flavour.
- Tangent: Despite looking evil and hideous to us, sharks have more reason to fear humans, than the other way round. Their teeth structure is also amazing, considering that they point backwards and every time one falls out, one from the row behind moves forward.
- An octopus has 2 legs, or to be more specific, they use 2 arms while moving underwater, as sort of ambulatory gait, and the other 4 are used for holding food, so it could be said that they have 6 arms and 2 legs.
- Because of libration, you can see 59% of the Moon from the Earth. Libration is the sort of jiggling effect you get when you see the Moon. Obviously, when there are different phases of the Moon, you see less.
Episode 17 "Compilation Part 1"
- Broadcast Date
- Theme
- A clip show using unbroadcast material from Series G.
Episode 18 "Compilation Part 2"
- Broadcast Date
- Theme
- A clip show using unbroadcast material from Series G.
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